Finally

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5 weeks later.

"Come on babe!! You can do this! Your doing so good!" Ruby cheers as I take micro steps down the hallway. I was leaning over on my walker holding on for dear life as a nurse trailed on the side of me holding my IV.
Ruby brought out her phone and started taking a video
"Baby! you got this!" She was yelling causing everyone around to smile
I looked up smiling at her
"Ruby turn that off!" I giggle
"But your doing so good! This is amazing!" She turns the camera to her and says
"Lia is doing amazing guys! She's doing so much better! She's my hero! I mean look at her go!" She switches the camera over to me who's still down the hall taking baby steps with my walker in hand.
Ever since 5 weeks ago I've been helping myself recover as best as I can, ruby has been with me every step of the way. Im finally eating food again, on my own. Im able to go to the bathroom with only ruby helping me, I'm up a lot more.
My depression hasn't left me, I still think about suicide, I think about many depressing things. I have a hard time sleeping and focusing.
I'm now on antidepressants and a mood stabilizer, but they haven't kicked in. I have only been on them for a few days now.
My doctors says once I get to 100 pounds I'm safe to go home, I'm now at 95 which is a big difference from 72. I don't look so ill anymore, I'm smiling. And ruby makes me feel good, constantly telling me how amazing I am, and how beautiful I look even though I haven't looked in a mirror in god knows how long. I can only imagine what I look like.
I'm thinking along the lines of gross.
I'm suppose to do another physical today to see if I've gained. I'm so excited to go home.
Finally.

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