Why?

XXXVI

She stared straight past me, and released a long breath.
"Is something wrong baby?"
"I'm...Just tired."
"You wanna go straight to bed?"
"Hmm, I'm uh, aching."
"Really? Didn't you get a massage at the spa?"
"God what's with the questions Lindsey!" She snapped, hurting me a little after I'd planned this whole day out for her.
"I'm sorry," she mumbled moments later.
"Forget it," I stood up and saw her bottom lip begin to tremble but left her anyway. I showered quickly, drying myself before dressing myself in a pair of boxers and an old t-shirt that happened to smell of her. I find her waiting on our bed, still fully clothed.
"I thought you were tired?"
"I am, but I was thinking."
"Yeh well, I'll be in the bedroom, if you ever finish."
I stride back indoors and kick off my shoes as I pull off my clothes. Initially I throw them all into a pile, but then curse and shove them into the closet as to avoid yet more bitterness. I climb into bed and try to sleep, but soon hear the balcony doors slide open again, and glimpse Stevie's shadow creeping silently across the darkened room then into the bathroom. She's in there a while but I never hear her flush or switch on any taps, but at some point she begins to sniff and I guess she is crying. Eventually I buckle and go to open the door but it's locked.
"Let me in Stevie."
"No."
"Why?"
"Just, I'm busy."
"Really?"
"I look a mess, OK! Jesus fucking Christ."
"You think I've not seen worse?"
I try to joke, but she unlocks the door and storms out, tears racing down her cheeks.
"God, what did I do wrong?"
"I..." She stammers as she stares into the mirror hanging on the wall.
"Hey? On your period or something?" I smirk as I brush her hair onto one side of her neck and rest my head on her shoulder.
"I don't think I'm getting those anymore." My stomach sunk. I knew she was dreading that, it reminding her that we couldn't have any more children. It was already a miracle that Hannah had been possible.
"Oh...Well...What is is then baby?"
"It doesn't matter right...No, it doesn't matter." Knowing her to be overdramatic, I thought little into what she said then.
"So shall we go to bed?"
"Ok." I wanted more but by the time I'd worked up the courage to take her into my arms she was in a deep, peaceful sleep. Moments like this were what I treasured more than anything, and just by looking down at her face in the silvery moonlight, I knew why.