On Tour

Chapter 47- Life Plan

Josh's POV

      "Will you and Amara come on tour again next year?" "I'm thinking of going back to medical school." Oh?
     Lily breaks eye contact, looking at the ground, then she slouches back in the chair and sighs. I bite my lip and look down at my baby. She looks like an angle when she's sleeping, she has long, curly eyelashes just like Lily. I bounce Amara around, looking up at Lily. She's pondering, staring at the side table as if it were out of this world. A piece of her silky brown hair falls out of her pony tail and in front of her face and she blows it away. I laugh, she's so pretty and cute it's impossible to hold a grudge against her, "You know, I was actually coming to find you to talk about you and the whole medical situation." I start, looking down at Amara, feeling her forehead, she seems the right temperature, "When you were teaching Jenna how to hold and feed Amara, Tyler and I, we talked," suddenly interested, Lily sits up it the outhouse position looking me in the eyes, I look down at the baby and continue on, "He told me about how you were training to become a surgeon, and about how you saved that baby's life. If it's something you really want to do, going back to finish your internship and residency at the hospital, I'll support you, we can figure out a way." I say, I pull Amara closer to my chest and she starts to snore softly. I giggle and lift her head up higher. I look at Lily, her expression constantly changing, she does this a lot when she's thinking. She tucks her hair behind her ear running her fingers down her jawline. I'm so lucky to be able to call her my wife. She shakes her head, reaching for the cooler on the side of the seat. There's a pop noise, she starts rumbling through the ice water. "Want anything?" She says huskily, she's tired, run down even, you can tell she hasn't gotten much sleep. "Water," I say, tired myself. I worry for her, I wish she would sleep, she'd feel so much better. "Here," she says her voice cracking as she hands me a dripping cold water. I take it and she cracks open an ice cold can of coke, I'm sure we aren't suppose to have coke in here but oh well. She takes a sip and she squints her face, "Carbonation?" I say, she hasn't had pop in a while. "Oh yea." She says clenching her teeth as she sets her coke on the side table. She shakes and gets the chills, "Here." I say handing her one of Amara's blankets. Lily wraps it around her small, tan shoulders. "Josh," she starts off snuggling up to the blanket that smells like baby, "I really do want to finish out med school and become a surgeon. But I feel stuck, and not in a bad way. My life is amazing right now, I have you, Amara, and Tyler and Jenna. I wouldn't change the world for that, but. I feel like if I attempt going back to med school, everything will become challenging and I don't want to break the balance." She says, dang she starts talking really wise when she's tired. I consider this for a moment, thinking of the up's and down's of each decision. Lily seems to be doing the same for the room is silent. Just the sound of small snores coming from pre-me babies. I start thinking about everything, Lily being away for long months, having to trade with Amara every month, it could work. Sure, it'd be difficult, but I guess that's just, life? "We could do this. We can finish out this years tour, and then maybe we could go to next years tour. Then when that tour ends you can go finish up medical school. We could trade Amara off every month. And When your finished with your 8 years of residency and internship, tour will probably be done, and we can settle down and get a house." I say, you know this could work, settling down with Lily and our baby sounds amazing. "How about when she starts school though?" Lily asks looking down at Amara. Yikes, didn't even think of that. Uhh..... "She'd have to go to a school down in Cleveland, I'd be on tour, so I'd be everywhere. Maybe we do this, when she starts school she stays with you, when it's summer, she comes with me." I finish, I stand up and walk over to the crib. I lift Amara up and set her down in her crib. I give her the pink silky blanket I bought her and lay it on her. "Sweet Dreams," I whisper rubbing her soft cheek. I smile down at her, and then go back to sitting down. "This can work, we can make this happen, right?" She says, her words laced with worry. I laugh and say confidently, "This can work. We can get a huge house, with a big backyard, a swimming pool," "A swing set," "A swing set, everything and anything we've ever wanted." I finish smiling at her beautiful tired face. I feel like this will be challenging, I mean what in life isn't? Lily, rustles around, bringing her knees up to her chest, she lies sideways on the chair, cuddling up to her blanket. She softly closes her eyes in the dim light and says hoarsely , "I love you, so so much, I love you Josh." I smile, a part of her hair falls onto her resting face, "I love you too, super much." I say and she chuckles. We can do this, building a life together seems exciting. We finally have everything figured out. Of course I'm worried though, becuase one little thing could happen and then BAM, there goes our plan. But, I've got to stay positive. We can do this, we can do this, we can do this.... my eyes flutter shut and I start to feet snoozy.