On Tour

Chapter 52

A few weeks later, back in Ohio, the tour has ended and everyone is back at Josh's home. They are having a party and everyone's families and friends are there.
I grab a beer out of the fridge and pop it open on the counter. Everyone's in the living and dining room so the kitchen is all but me, empty. My best friend Katie walks in, twirling her blond hair. "Beer?" She says, "Fridge." I reply, leaning against the counter. I take a drink, I like being back in town and seeing everyone together, especially her, I missed my best friend. Katie pops open her beer and walks over next to me, leaning on the counter as well. "How you liking the party?" She starts off and I reply, "It's weird having all the families together," "Weird good?" "Weird good. I've just gotten so use to it just being us four, and now five, it's just, different." I say taking a sip. "I know many people have probably already asked you this, but I haven't gotten the chance. How are you, you know, with Amara being, 'his', kid?" I look out into the living room, I can see all the mom's playing with her on the floor, "Honestly, I don't know. I love her to pieces, don't get me wrong. I've gotten use to telling people about it and like, I know my situation but... sometimes, when I look at her... I see 'his' eyes staring right back at me. I can't tell Josh, or mom, or Ethan that although, becuase you know them. They'll try and talk to me and pity me and, I don't want that. Hell, Josh loves her to death, them too get along explicitly well." I look back at her, "Is it weird, that I feel this way, like, am I bad mom for thinking of her that way?" "No, this whole situation is still fresh in your mind. I'm out-stood how your acting about it, you seem almost untouched, from an outsiders prospective of course." "I do? Because I'm bent all out of shape up here," I say motioning my beer to my head, "You'll be fine, you always are." She says, winking at me, drinking. I smile back at her and we start walking towards the living room.
"Hi baby, lets go get you your bottle ok?" I say, saving Amara from smothering family members. I pick her up and hold her in one of my arms, she seems overwhelmed and keeps whipping her head back and forth to look at the 17 different conversations going on in the room. I start walking with her towards the kitchen, and then I'm stopped, "Lily, hi! Oh and is that my granddaughter, lemme see this little bundle of joy!" I hear Laura, Josh's mom, from the side of me say, "Laura, Hi!" I say as she takes Amara from my arm. She tickles her and Amara laughs, that's one thing about my baby is that even in the most overwhelmingly long days, she still has energy to laugh, "She's beautiful! How are you dear?" She says, bouncing a humming Amara around. "Enjoying the daring moments of motherhood, how about yourself?" I say laughing, "I'm great, especially now that I have her in my arms," she kisses her cheek, "Has she learned to crawl yet?" I cross my arms and say, "Alarmingly yes, she has a dire tendency of stuffing things in her mouth." "One of the many joys of motherhood." Laura says sarcastically with a smile, handing me back Amara.  "Talk to you later babe." She says smiling, waking away from us. I love Laura, she's honestly the sweetest and funniest thing.
   "And now I know what it's like to be the mother at a party," I mutter, Amara's almost finished with her bottle. We're in the empty kitchen again, Amara's really drowsy. Some people have disappeared from the party and it's midnight. It's way past the usual time Amara goes to bed so I can tell why she's beat. "If I'm bombarded with one more question," Josh say's walking into the kitchen, setting his beer down on the table. "Shhh, she's almost sleeping." I say, he comes over and looks down at her, brushing some of her hair out of her small face. I feel Josh's hot air on my neck and I desire a kiss, but I hold back, becuase I hear the sucking noises from Amara stop. I pull the bottle out of her mouth and hand it to Josh, "Lets go put her down," I say, steadily standing up. Josh helps me and we both start tip-toeing towards the stairs, "We're gonna go put Amara down, we'll be back," Josh whispers to his dad before we start carefully walking up the stairs. The party noises from downstairs recede the more steps we climb. We turn on the hallway light and make our way to the closest room. Josh goes to open the door and, "Damnit, TYLER!" "Woahhhhh!" Me and josh say in unison, slamming the door. We hear Jenna and Tyler scatter in the room, and I look down at Amara, surprisingly still sleeping. I look up and Josh, both of us trying not to burst out laughing. A piece of his yellow hair falls in front of his face as the door whips opens. Jenna and Tyler both wearing a sheet, open the door, as Tyler says, "What are you two doing?" "Trying to put our baby down to sleep." I say, still trying not to obnoxiously laugh, "What are you two doing?" Josh says, smirking, "We're doing Taxes," Jenna pipes in, Josh leans in towards me and pretends to whisper, "They sure are doing something in there...," he says winking. A chuckle escapes me, and Tyler playfully hits Josh. They shut the door and we start walking towards the next room. We are still trying not to laugh and we reach the next door, "Knock this time Genius," I say laughing, he laughs and knocks. No reply. He opens the door, and to our god-forbidden relief, there is no one doing their taxes. "We good." He says and I follow him into the dark room. He pulls out two blankets rolling them up, and putting them onto the bed. I lay her in the middle of the bed, in between the two blankets so she doesn't fall. I lay a blanket over her and she sleeps silently and peacefully. I sigh and we start walking out of the room, "Night baby," "Goodnight Amara," we whisper before slowly shutting the door. Then, we start to laugh, hysterically, out loud. I grab my stomach, "I'm crying," I say in between laughs, "My stomach hurts," he says in between his laughs. After a whileeeee, we calm down, with a few occasional relapse of chuckles. "That got me in the mood to do our taxes," he says pulling me close, I laugh and push his chest away, "Later babe," I say, still laughing, we link arms and make our way downstairs, back to the party.