All I Want

6

I couldn't stop staring out the window. Harold's eyes couldn't stop popping in my mind. The way his voice sounded, it was like my favorite song on repeat. I heard familiar foot steps on the stairs but then my mind drifted back to the window. 

"There's my girl!" I turned my face to the door and it was my father. I smiled at him and got up from the bed, running toward his open arms.

"Dad! You're finally here!" I hugged him tight, and he did too. The smell of his cologne was the same one from the times I was a little girl. I used to steal his cologne and wear it all day just because missing him was a daily thing. It still is... sometimes.

"Missed you," He placed a kiss on my head as he held me tighter. We finally let go, but not completely, he still had an arm around me. "Where's your mother?" I shrugged and then turned around to walk toward my bed, expressing indifference the best I could. "Did something went wrong?"

"At all," I smiled, politely, trying to hide the fact how unhappy I was with the whole ring situation. "I'm actually getting married. Thanks to mom." His eyes were open wide, surprised. He then, shook his head and smiled. 

"Congratulations darling, I hope that's everything you want," He pressed his lips together. "Mostly, I hope Conor knows how to make you happy." 

"I hope so too dad, how did that business trip go?"

"Uh," He cleared his throat. "It a-all went good, sweetheart. I-I missed you." He stuttered. 

"Want to grab some lunch with me?" I asked, expecting a positive response. 

"I'll tell you later, I need to head to the office." He looked nervous.

"You have to keep working?" I asked, curious. He nodded and left the room. I walked toward the bureau and stared at my reflection in the mirror. I took the brush in my hands and slowly, I slid it through my hair, untangling it.

"Where have you been? And please don't lie to me!" I overheard my mom yelling. I walked towards the door and tried to eavesdrop.

"I already told you. Stop trying to create a drama out of nowhere." My father replied, through his teeth. 

"Were you with her?" She whispered. I shut the door, trying not to make a sound. I knew something was wrong. Those same thoughts my mom had, I had them too. I just kept my mouth shut, because whatever happens between them, stays between them. They've always said that. I took a deep breath, as I let my body rest against the door. My cell phone rang. I walked over to the night stand and took it in my hands. It was a text from Conor.

'Good morning, my love. I'll pick you up for a celebration dinner with my friends. Love you.'

I rolled my eyes and didn't bother at all to reply. I put the phone back on the night stand and then threw myself on the bed. I let a sigh come out of my lips as I tried to think of the moment I fell out of love with Conor and why did it happen. And as I couldn't think of anything, I started to think of the moment we first met and our first kiss and the first time his skin was on mine. I was expecting this whole stampede of elephants running in my stomach, but I felt nothing. I decided to fall asleep for whatever remains of the day, until it was time for me to get ready for this celebratory dinner. I grabbed my phone and set the alarm for 6:00 p.m. and then I placed it back on the night stand. I pulled the sheets right on top of me and closed my eyes.

The alarm went off. I moaned, complaining, because I slept the entire day and somehow I wanted to keep sleeping. I pushed the sheets away from me and stood up from the bed. I walked toward the bathroom and as I stepped into the shower, my toes flinched as they touched the ceramic floor. I waited for the water to turn warm and once it did, I let my whole body feel the temperature, except for my hair. It took me about ten minutes to shower and as I got out, I wrapped a towel around me. I walked into my closet and took out a red strapless dress. The length was right above the knees and it danced along to the movements of my body. I took out some nude sandals. My hair rested on top of my shoulders and as I finished my makeup, I heard Conor's voice downstairs. I pressed my lips together, as I tried to get color on the top lip. I fixed my hair one last time and walked out of my room. 

"Hey!" We both said as we encountered each other as he walked up the stairs, with intentions of heading to my room. "You look beautiful." He kissed my forehead, I responded with a smile and we walked downstairs hand in hand. He opened the door for me and waited for me to get inside the car. He, then, got inside the car and shut the door. "First we need to stop at a gas station. I need to buy something for Camille." 

"Why at a gas station?" 

"I don't know. She was all mysterious. You know how she is." I chuckled. She was Conor's cousin and she had this tendency of acting all fishy whenever she needed something from someone. The best example is this gas station situation. After five minutes of driving we reached a gas station. Conor parked the car and pecked my lips before getting out. I searched for a radio station to hear while I waited for him. Suddenly, I heard a familiar voice. I looked for the source, just to check if I wasn't creating things in my mind. I see Harold walking toward the back of the gas station and I, recklessly, got out of the car and started to walk toward him. It was difficult to run, but I walked as fast as I could.

"Harold!" I yell. "Wait up." He turned around and I stopped. Our eyes met. He looked at me and in that moment I felt that elephant stampede I was longing to feel with Conor. 

"Taylor," I walked closer to him. "I was walking to the bathroom. What are you doing here?" He asked and then turned his back on me. He started walking toward the bathroom. The alley was dark and I started to feel a little cold.

"I wanted to see you."

"I need to use the restroom," He said, not keeping his eyes away from me. "Is there anything you need from me?" I stared at his lips as he talked and a sudden desire to kiss him got into me. 

"Get inside," I opened the wooden door for him and pushed him. I got inside as fast as I could and turned the light on. The stall was so small, it was a miracle we both could fit inside. "Harold, I don't want to get married." He let a sigh come out of his lips.

"What do I have to do with your relationship?" 

"Everything."

"What?" He furrowed his eyebrows. I leaned in and his lips brushed mine. It wasn't innocent at all. From the very second it started it was fiery and passionate. It felt like he needed to do this as much as I needed to. It was demanding the way his tongue played with mine, and how my legs were wrapped around his. It was our very first kiss and it felt like nothing I've felt before. My senses were lost and I wanted it to go further. His hands were on my thighs, as he tried not to let me fall. 

"Taylor!?" It was Conor from a distance, and it seemed like he was looking for me. 

"Don't stop." I demanded. We kept going on with the kiss, but as we heard Conor's footsteps approaching us, we stopped. I fixed my dress and checked my lipstick on the mirror. To my surprise nothing was unfixed. 

"I don't think I can go on with my night after this." He chuckled and pressed his forehead on mine. 

"Taylor?! Are you here?" Conor asked. I put my hand on top of Harold's lips. 

"Yes, I had to pee. Wait for me in the car. I'm almost done."

"Okay, you had me worried."

"It's okay, love. I'll be there in a minute," I lied. I heard him walking away. "I can't stop thinking about you. Tell me you feel the same." I confessed.

"I do. I need to have more of this, but not tonight. You need to go and we can sort this whole thing out. Tomorrow." I nodded and took a deep breath. I walked out of the stall and with a whole different emotion running around my entire body, I reached Conor's car and got in. 

"Did I tell you how beautiful you look?" He asked and I just smiled. I needed to end this. Tonight.