Save me // ziall ✓

| Chapter Ten |

I could write a song, a hundred miles long, that's where I belong, and you belong with me.

 

~ Z a y n ' s  P O V~

I turn on my heel, and see the spiked blonde hair, the watery blue eyes. /The eyes of a cheater./ A small voice echo's in my head. He walks through the door, the boys in toe, who shut the door quickly, and I have a feeling that the paps where on our tail, meaning we would have to call the poo-poo's again. I sighed, and ran a hand through my hair, which wasn't gelled up for once.

"Look we need to talk." Niall said, stepping into the living room.

"There's nothing to talk about Niall. I left because my family needed me, and you cheat." I say, defending myself.

"I was shit-faced!" Niall says, his voice rising a few octives.

"That's not a valid excusse!" I spat back, anger flowing through my blood stream.

It's so much easier to be mad everyone, then mopping around and wallowing in self pity. Niall's face drops, knowing he's lost this fight. He turns on his heel, and walks out of the room, and up the stairs. I knew he was just as messed up as I am about it. I'm seething since I was left to my thoughts, and I walk over, and punch the wall, making a loud /thud/ and leaving a big dent in the wall. At that, Liam comes into the room, and has shock written all over his face.

"Z, calm down." He says softly, walking over to me, and wrapping his arms around me.

At that moment in time, I just can't take it anymore, and I break. I feel myself falling to pieces in his arms, with everything that has transpiered; with my grandfather, Niall, and Perrie. Liam holds me tight, and guides me to the floor. He leans against the wall, and tries to hush me, but it doesn't work. I guess I fall asleep, and Liam carries me and lays me in my bed.

My dreams weren't good that night, not one little bit. I kept seeing blood everywhere, and Niall with another man, which broke my heart. I see Perrie living happily with another man, and having three kids. I see Harry and Louis getting married, and adopting kids. I see Liam and Danielle getting married and having kids.

Where do I see myself?

Alone, and in a bar. Drinking away my guilt, and pain.

I sit up from my dream, awaking in a cold sweat, with my blankets twisted tightly around me. I take deep breathes to calm myself, knowing I won't be able to fall back to sleep tonight.

~ N i a l l ' s  P O V~ (Might trigger, please read at your own risk)

 I laid on my bed, my face facing the ceiling, as I wallowed in self pity. I felt my skin prickle, as the urge to call my friend, Razor up and have a date. I felt the guilt pooling in my stomach, as I pushed myself off my bed, and dragged myself towards the bathroom. I closed the door behind me, and I opened the draw, and ran my hand across the top, smiling softly when I was prodded by the edge of my razor. I tapped them to the top, no one would ever know where they where.

I pulled the tap off, hearing the razor drop into the draw. I captured it in my hand, and slowly dragged my hand out, flipped it over and opened it. My razor reflected the light from the light-bulbs, and I felt my urge sky rocket. I pulled up my sleeve, and took off my bracelet that said 'Nialler'. I took a tight grip on the razor, and placed it above my wrist. I took a deep breath, and pressed down, and pulled across, the skin splitting and the blood trickling down my wrist.

The pain went away, and was replaced by pleasure. I repeated the action about five more times, before placing the razor down on the counter top, and sticking my forearm over the tap, turning it on, and wincing when the cold water splashed down over my cuts. I cleaned them off, and found bandages to wrap around them, and pulled my sleeve back down, and put my bracelt back on.

I hid my razor again, and cleaned up any other blood. For now I felt amazing, but I knew tomorrow I would regret it.

A/N; I feel like I'm going to regret writing this....oh well.