help me do this - Aaron Carpenter FF

Chapter 49 - cry

-- Aarons POV --

I hate to see her cry, with the tears I've made. So I follow her.

Though my brain says she cheated on me and she lied, my heart loves her.

"Come on." I say and extend my hand towards her, which she ignores.

She is so into crying, she doesn't even notice what happens around her.

I lift her up and let her down into the passengers seat of my car.

Lis doesn't react. All I want is her to stop crying, because it hurts me more, than her kissing Shawn.

Or Shawn kissing her?

As quick as possible, I drive home and carry her up to my bedroom.

"Please stop crying." I beg her, while carefully laying her down on my bed.

"I don't want to lose Aaron." she mumbles, obviously not knowing I was sitting next to her.

"I'm here. You're at my house." I wake her into reality.

"I can't-" she sobs, sitting up.

"I just need to think." I reply.

"If you don't want to do this anymore, I can understand. You were always too good for me anyways. But I just want you to know that I love you..." still tears spill out of her eyes, but her throat is clear and I can understand every word. And every single one hurts.

Instantly I put my arms around her. Maybe I'm not supposed to do this now, but I just feel she needs someone to hold her and I need someone to hold.

"Sh, stop crying..." I try to sooth her, though I almost cry too.

I just don't know what to do. 

My brain tells me to leave her, to break up.

But my heart loves her and I know she loves me too.

"C-Can we work this out?" she suddenly asks looking up at me.

"Do you want to work this out?" I ask back.

She nods.

"I love you but it's hard, cause your only supposed to kiss me and.." 

"Believe me, I didn't want this" Lisa wants to convince me.

"Just go sleep now." I say and get up from my bed.

"You won't join me?" she mumbles very quietly.

"I um, I'm just gonna go outside for a while. Tryna think. I'll be as quiet as possible when I come back." I assure and leave the room.

Silent I go outside and sit on the veranda, where I want to sort my thoughts, but there is only one.

Can I forgive Shawn?

And I ask myself, if the question should be

Can I forgive Lisa?

but I it's not.

I need her. But do I need Shawn?

My best guy friend just forced my girlfriend into something. I'm not dealing with him for the next few days, I suppose.

"Hey.." a soft voice says from behind me and I feel a hand at my elbow.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" I ask Lisa.

"I can't..." she murmurs.

"There's too much to think about. I feel bad." she tells me.

I can't help it. I forgive her. When I look at her, I just can't believe she would be willing to make out with Shawn.

"It's okay." I say and hug her softly.

"I'm sorry..." she mumbles, but I ignore that. 

Carefully I lift her up and she puts her legs around my waist.