Waiting To Exhale

Fourty-seven

   I double check to make sure the sleeves of my hoodie are pulled down. Its a little hot under here but I'm just going to have to deal with it. A smal older-looking woman holds the door open for me as I head into the building. I thank her before going to find an open seat. Its seven-thirty on a Friday so all the other teens are having fun at the home football game, where I told Mason I would be.

   I have a ticket in my purse. I had to make everything seem legit or I'll earn myself another beating. That's something I'm not prepared for. I'll never be prepared for something like that. Once I get tired of waiting and tapping my foot against the floor I get up and order a smoothie. I pay for it with the extra cash I had rather than Mason's credit card. I wouldn't be able to explain how I paid for a smoothie with his card when I was suppose to be at the game.

   I hear the bell at the front door jiggle and snap my head up. I'm pleased to discover its him. I was starting to worry sitting here all alone. He greets me with a warm hug and light conversation before sitting down.

   "I'm sorry I haven't been in contact with you lately. I just had a lot going on," I start. After all I am the one that owes an explanation.

   "Nah it's okay. I'm just glad you're here now."

   "I really am sorry Anthony."

   "I know that. Nice glasses." Anthony complements, causing me to squirm in my seat. I quickly thank him, clearing my suddenly clogged throat. He nods. "You missed the cookout but I still want you to meet my family. They want to meet you too. How's tomorrow?"

   "I don't know. I'll have to check."

   "Check? With who, your boyfriend?"

   "Wow Anthony. That was so uncalled for. And for the record I've been trying to catch up on my school work. I missed too many days and if I can't get it together I'll probably fail, ruining any chance of me getting into a good college that I probably won't even be able to afford anyway," I say matter-of-factly. I didn't mean to get all snippy with him but I'm just so stressed. I've just been so stressed lately. All this is too much. I can't take it. I wish I could escape again to that little house in the middle of the woods. I had nothing to worry about then.

   Now it's different.

   A part of me wish I never met Mason but that's selfish of me. He's done so much for me. I just wish he wasn't so angry all the time.

   And my dad...he was suppose to be getting better. Now he's nowhere to be found. He completely checked out. There's no getting better from this. I'm broken and I know it.

   I rub my hand roughly across my forehead. "Sorry. I didn't mean to get snippy with you. My head hurts trying to juggle everything going on in my life. I feel like I'm going to explode. I really wish I would already. I'm tired of waiting. I'm just tired." I feel hot tears forming but I try my best to refrain them.

   "It'll get better. Don't worry Liv. You can always come talk to me. I'm here. Even when you don't want me to be. I love you. You're like family to me." I can no longer hold back. I let the tears fall from my big narrow eyes. I shouldn't cry and I know that. Mason hates when I cry.

   Anthony gets up from his seat to wrap his long arms around me. That only makes me cry harder. I'm sure people are staring at me like I'm crazy but I can't help it. I taste the salt from my tears. I move to wipe my face and my glasses fall off. I scramble to try to pick them up but Anthony beats me to it. I try to cover my face but he moved my hands away. Anger and shock is displayed on his face. "Okay now I'm really worried. What the hell is wrong with you? You tying to hide this from me? You let that nigga put his hands on you?"

   "No! It...it wasn't on purpose. He didn't mean to." I don't want to lie to Anthony but for me to just come out and tell the truth would be bad for the both of us. Anthony is not going to sit back and let it keep happening. He's very protective and so is Mason. Anthony gives me a look and I know he doesn't believe me. "Mason loves me. He wouldn't intentionally hurt me. Leave it alone."

   "Fine," he says reluctantly after a long pause, "but if you're not at my house tomorrow we're going to have a problem."

   I offer a light laugh to ease the mood. Anthony finally let's me go and sits back in his seat, handing me my glasses. I slip them back on. I check the clock, "I need to get back. I'll try my best to make it tomorrow."

   I give him a tight hug before collecting my things and calling a cab. Anthony waits with me until it comes. I give him another hug before getting in. I make it to the game and find a seat. I spend most of my time on my phone. I'm not one for football. Its just I never had anyone explain anything to me. The only thing I understand is a touchdown. When the game is over I make sure to get the score.

   Mason picks me up right on time. He gives me a kiss on the cheek and tell me he missed me. I tell him about seeing Anthony, of course leaving out the part that me going to watch the game was just a cover-up to see him. Thank God Mason gave me my phone back before going to the game. I knew it was a big risk to take but I had to. I hadn't seen Anthony in too long. He's a good friend. I couldn't just abandon him. Now I just have to figure out how to get to his house to meet his parents. I feel so bad for bailing on him at the BBQ.

   "I saw Anthony. He wants me to have dinner with his family tomorrow." I decide to fess up and tell him.

   "You wanna go?" He ask raising an eyebrow.

   "Can I?"

   "Sure," he says, leaving me to wonder why he gave in so easily.