Is Your Warriors OC A Mary-Sue?

Thistlepaw

This OC was submitted by fireheart_warriors.

Name: Thistlepaw/Thistlefrost

Ooh, I like the name, and he's an apprentice, like I said with Olivepaw, I don't see too many of them.

Nickname: None

Clan/Rank: Originally CaveClan, but was accepted into MarshClan once CaveClan was destroyed. He's an apprentice

Apprentice(s): None, as he is one. I do intend to give him one later as a warrior

Gender: Tom-cat

Looks: Typical brown tabby tom, lighter underbelly. Permanently missing a claw on the front left.

Nice details, wonder how he lost his claw.

Personality: Thistlepaw is rather snappy and impatient, but that probably come from his urge to be a warrior. He laughs at others mistakes, though get angry if other laugh at his own. Self loathes, and sometimes just needs to chill out

Sounds like an Aries. Heheh

Mate/Crush/Kit(s): No mate or kits, and his crush is TBD, so therefore none for now

*SeaSorcerer.EXE has crashed* *reboot? Yes* *loading loading* *reboot successful* uh... what does TBD mean? I'm an idiot when it comes to these kind of things, as in abbreviations...

Sexuality: Straight. (Quite basic, sorry)

Nah, that's fine.

Age: 8 moons, almost 9 moons

Parents: Grayfur (father, deceased), and Berryshine (mother).

Siblings: Burrowkit (brother, deceased), Havenkit (sister, deceased) and Cayonleap (alive)

Cayonleap? Um... I'm not sure, but is that a typo, orrrr...?

Bio/Backstory: Thistlepaw, Thistlekit at the time, was born to Berryshine, the oldest queen in CaveClan, one of the six Clans, as well as two other kits. He was born the runt of the litter, but was only one out of the litter to survive through the next couple of days after birth. His much older brother, Cayonleap was already a warrior, and as was his father Grayfur. As he grew older, his father became an elder earlier than expected due to the loss of sight, and died two moons later after being moved to the elders den. Thistlekit was four moons at the time, and became an apprentice to Herondive, ehile Cayonleap became deputy. Thistlepaw became friends with the other four apprentices in the Clan, Bloompaw (she-cat), Rowanpaw (tom), Poppypaw (she-cat), and Echopaw (she-cat). Soon after that, the leader Cavestar (all leaders have the prefix of their clan, I know, original), fell ill with an unknown and deadly disease, that they began to call redcough. CaveClan meme era fell ill and died, and the survivors were sent running to the other five Clans in search of a new home. The apprentices were split up, and Thistlepaw was sent into MarshClan.

Huh, interesting. I don't mind the fact that the leaders have the name of their Clan, only because they are made up Clans in a made up version of the Warriors world, so the rules are obviously going to be different. It's kind of like the Tribe of Rushing Water's Stoneteller, how they are renamed Teller of Pointed Stones when given the rank of Stoneteller.

Relation to any main characters?: None

Likes: Catching frogs, battle practice, sleeping

Dislikes: Bristledawn (MarshClan med-cat), cold days, his brother's attitude

Strengths: Stealth, battle, if you would count being snappish all the time a strength

Weaknesses: The thought of his old Clan, fighting his old friends

Extras: The five other Clans are ForrestClan, MooreClan, LakeClan, HiddenClan, and MarshClan, just in case

Forrest, with two R's, is the spelling of the name Forrest, while the other word for woodland, which is assumibly what you are trying to say, is spelled with one R. Not trying to criticize on the spelling, just trying to help. (It'd be spelled ForestClan for the correct spelling of Forest)

So,n I do like this character, and wigh just a bit of tweaking, he could be an amazing character!

I give this OC:
90% Original
10% Changeable