My Beta Mates

Chapter 5:Pain pain and more pain.

I woke up to a piercing scream only to realize it was mine. The pain in my chest was excruciating and I could not stop it. Endless tears flowed down my cheeks and onto my pillow. Ahh!!. I kept on screaming as wave after wave of this pain hit me. No one came to help no one cared as I was in this hell for hours. The pictures of my mates flouting in and out of my mind. They were supposed to love me, to care for me no matter what they were suppose to be my better half's my souls ultimate other half. They should be caressing me loving me and ensuring that my every need was taken care of but no they were hurting me. Each and every night for the past three months they have been doing nothing but causing me pain. I told no one because no one cared I was alone in the world with no family no friend and in the three months I've been here I still haven't been accepted into this pack properly. I still had no memory and each and every day was it was just Ares pulling me through but I couldn't take it any more. Just like every other night my mates were having sex with other people. I stopped caring who those people were because they changed every night. Each thrust they made into a person was a sharp pain to my heart each moan was loud and clear in my ears, each pant was like a punch to my gut. Three months and I was enduring this pain every night. I was loosing weight and I looked worse each and every day, there was nothing here for anymore. I didn't have my memory, my mates and now my wolf was quiet also. Ares was tired of being strong for us that he just went quiet. He couldn't be strong for anymore he tried but without his mates he was also deteriorating and I was grateful for his strength but I knew that he would also cave in at some point. The pain came once more and I curled into myself as I waited for it to be over but tonight it seem that they are on a roll because they didn't stop until four in the morning. I no longer had tears left in me to cry so I was just whimpering as the pain began to subside, I started praying "Oh goddess why me... " my voice now hoarse from all the screaming "why allow all this to happen to me, am I not meant to find happiness.... Please accept my soul so that I can finally be free from the pain please just please take my life so I won't have to live through the pain again please please please release me from the chains of pain and take my soul so it can find eternal peace. " I don't have the energy to get up so I took the pain medication that I received when I got here and opened the bottle to find about thirty pills in there, they should work I thought as one by one I took the pills until my body became heavy and my eyes began to drop. A smile crept on my face because I knew that I was escaping the pain and they from now on I would never have another moment of pain. I was going to my mother now to be free and man it felt good. Darkness began to creep up on me and I welcomed it with both arms and let it take me to my final home where only peace reigns where no one can harm me where I could finally stop crying.