Break free || l.h.

Chapter 9

•WARNING: very short chapter!•

Luke's P.O.V.

Last night has been crazy. Luckily for Charlie, she didn't got another nightmare. I'm still holding her small hand, carefully rubbing circles with my thumb. It's half past eight in the morning now, she can wake up anytime.

My eyes feel really heavy, I only got one hour of sleep.

I couldn't just lay next to her, that would be a little odd.

I see her slowy opening her eyes, and when she sees I'm in the room, she tenses up.

"I forgot you were here. Didn't you sleep? At all?" She asks, with little eyes.

"I did, not a lot ofcourse. I needed to stay awake for you." I reply, not looking up to her.

I'm not sure if she still trusts me, I doubt it.

The next few hours are going terribly slow. I just don't know what to do with her. She doesn't say anything, she just sits there, looking at her phone.

When I touch her on her arm, she jerks away.

"Don't touch me!" She almost yells, and I back off quickly.

"My god, Luke. Sorry."

I say nothing and just walk to the kitchen. I take a seat at the table and draw some random figures with my fingers on the cold surface.

The kitchen door cracks a little, so I look up, right into Charlie's brown eyes. She smiles though.

"Sorry for what happened, I'm still in a little shock from last night." She says, while walking over me.

She bends over to me, and she lightly kisses me. It feels odd, this is not how I know her.

When she brakes the kiss, I open my eyes to see a smiling Charlie.

But there's something different about it.

It's fake. You can tell by the abscent of that beautiful spark in her eyes.

She puts a strand of hair behind her ear and walks back to the living room.

I don't know what to do. Is it that she doesn't love me anymore?

Or is it the fact that she's really not over the nightmare?

I don't know for how long I've been sitting here now, thinking about her. The clock makes a loud ticking sound, and I count every tick. It's nerve-wrecking not to know what's wrong with your girlfriend.

I've been drinking loads of coffee, I can't believe that I'm not hyper yet from all this caffeïne.

I guess it's just the lack of sleep that's backing me away.

I'm fumbling wit my lippiercing, that's my nerve-thing, I think.

By the time I glance over to the clock again, it's already twelve o'clock. Did I really sat here for two whole hours?

I decide to look what Charlie's doing, and obviously, she's just sitting on the couch again, texting. I wonder who she's always texting with.

"I'm talking to Joy, if you were wondering."

"I was just thinking that, creepy." I shuckle, and she glances over at me.

"What are you looking at?"

"Nothing, it's just that your lip is kinda bleeding." She answers calmly.

I run over to the bathroom, realising that my whole chin is smeared with blood.

And she replied this calm? What.

I quickly clean the red stuff from my face and go back downstairs.

"Luke? Uhm, I'm gonna go back home, if you don't mind." Charlie says, and I'm a bit dissapointed, but she had a lot going on now.

When I walk to her, to give her a hug, she backs away.

I take one step closer, I really shouldn't have done that .

Charlie's P.O.V.

He's coming to me. I swear he's going to strangle me, for real this time.

I slowly walk to the door, still facing Luke. He takes one step closer to me.

"Get away! I swear, if you touch me you're dead!" I scream, please don't let him hurt me.

He looks hurt at my words, but that's just a mask.

"What? Charlie.." He wines, but I continue walking to the door.

"I said get off! I don't know you anymore!" I scream, harder this time, not realising I was crying.

When I look over to Luke, he's crying too. He runs his hands through his blonde hair, God, it looks irresistable, but he's not what I thought he would be.

"Goodbye." I whisper, and I quickly open the door to get out of this hell.

Luckily it's not too hot outside, so I run to my appartment.

When I knock at the door, I forgot my key ofcourse, I wipe my eyes so Joy can't see I was crying.

I put my hair together in a ponytail, and wait for her to open the door.

Luke's P.O.V.

I can't believe what just happened. Charlie's affraid of me. I'm still at the door, on my knees. Crying. I really don't care how I look right now. Probably like a zombie. My throath is sore from the screaming, the cursing at myself.

The only person who've ever loved me, hates me now. I pull at the roots of my hair, and if it didn't hurt this much, I'd be bald by now. My hands form fists, and I slam at the floor as hard as I can.

"Fuck!" I scream, for what feels the thousanth time.

I'm thinking about this one thing I swore I'd never do it myself. But who cares about a silly heartbroken boy, right?

I slowly get up from the floor, my legs are almost numb.

I don't know with which tool I should do it, so I just walk to the kitchen.

After a few minutes of rumbling through drawers, I think I've might found it.

I used to use it for opening packages I got with the mail.

The handle is black, and I push the sharp blade untill it's long enough.

How do I need to do this?

I'm overthinking this too much, just do it.

I place the blades to my left wrist, and I push it in my skin, I need to make sure I'm hitting the right vein.

At first, there were a few scratches, but now there are visible marks with drops of blood. With every cut I push a little harder, I don't even feel it anymore. I need to be numb. My shirt has served as a towel, cleaning my arm every once in a while.

I can't seem to find the main vein. The cuts had stacked now, and I made some kind of checkered pattern on my wrists now.

This really gives me a kick. It works like a rubber band for me. Every time I think of her, I give myself a slash.

I don't know for how long I've been sitting on the floor, but I've stopped cutting, or at least, for now.

The blood has staunched, my whole arm covered in slashes, scratches, deep cuts and deepred blood.

I decide to rinse my arm, and the knife.

It itches and stings, but I'm kind of calm now.

When I look in the bathroom mirror, I see a person with dark circles under his bloodshot eyes, an inflamed lip and messy hair.

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So as I said a very short chapter, sorry!

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