When the ocean meets fire

~~~~~~~~~~~~Determination~~~~~~~~~~~~

Okay, a bit of a short one this time, but it's sort of one half of a pair of chapters that show Taz and Up's different reactions to last chapter. I think I may do the following chapters like this, without the ---split--- for a while to show how far away from each other they are

Please leave comments- I would love to hear more about what you think!

Thank you so much for reading

ThoseSunsetEyes

Xx

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After a week on the ship, and without Up, Taz had turned into the most irritable, rude, angry, and aggressive person they’d ever had in the G.L.E.E. No one passed her in the corridor, no one talked to her and NO ONE told her what to do. Her death glare was on display almost permanently; it was like she was stuck with that expression. She’d beaten up two ensigns for asking her about training, and didn’t open her door to ANYONE. Needless to say, she wasn’t ready to talk.

But in that first week on the ship, Taz had been a completely different person. Of course, she hadn’t shown it to the crew- she’d locked herself in her room, but she hadn’t been able to stop the raw emotions from flowing straight from her heart.

After tearing herself away from the glass doors of the starship, when it wasn’t possible for her to see Up anymore, she’d bolted straight for her room, looking at no one. She couldn’t remember exactly what had happened now, but at the end of it the chair had a large dent in one of its legs, there was paperwork for the mission all over the floor (although thankfully not ripped), her knuckles were bleeding and there were fat, hot, wet tears gushing from her eyes.

That was when the second phase of her first week’s emotions began. She found herself curled up in a ball in the centre of her bed, sobbing her heart out but trying to force the tears back. Jou’re weak, she constantly taunted herself, jou’re crying! Jou promised jourself dat jou would never cry again after jour Quincenera, and jou broke dat promise after Qu’Onos, jou broke it with Up nine months ago, and jou’re breaking it again now. Jou are an estupido. Pequeña. Chica.

She cried for the rest of that week, still taunting herself and willing the tears to go away, but her heart still aching and the same fact still fundamental:

She wasn’t going to see Up for a whole year.

The starship had taken off and she could do nothing about it.  She still remembered the look in his eyes as he watched her disappear off into space; she still remembered those words on his lips and how her heart leapt a light-year when he’d said them, and how it pulled on her heartstrings to remember it now; she still felt the intensity of his eyes when he’d walked towards her, still felt his fingers twisting through her hair,

still felt his lips on hers.

And despite all the crushing heartache she felt, that was when she decided. Decided that she knew why Up wanted her to go on the mission. He didn’t want her to go without something just because of him. She decided that she was going to be the most unbearable person on the ship because she wanted to make it clear that she didn’t want to be on it. She decided that every single thing she killed- be it alien, monster, zombie, vampire, werewolf or even a hijo de puta robota- would be for Up. She decided that she would get through this,

For Up.