It's Just Me

Is it because...?

She didn't let me kiss her. I think I can safely say that's never happened before. Even if she was pissed off, she'd let me kiss her. I usually got slapped across the face after, but... I can't believe she thinks we don't want her. Well, that we do, but only because we want to please the fans. Looking into her eyes, she looked so genuinely hurt by that. Sure, Mick has never been too subtle when it came to bringing whatever's going on in the band to the public, but I will not believe it for a second, that he intended to hurt her. How do I make her see? How do I make her realize that we do want her, because she's Stevie fucking Nicks and she's a huge part of that magic Fleetwood Mac has. 

A few days have passed, since I visited Stevie and I didn't call her after that. I'm not sure I should, it would only make things worse. Maybe something more is going on and she doesn't want to talk about it? Who to call, who to call...

"Yeah?"

"It's nice to hear you, too, Alex." I say, teasing him a little. 

"I'm sorry, Dad. I've had a long night." He yawns through his sentence. 

"Care to share at lunch?" I ask, checking my watch for time. A short pause later he agrees. "Great, then I'll pick you up in about an hour?"

"Sure."

We hang up after that and I get up from the couch, going to the bedroom for a change of clothes. I try to tame down my curly hair, as I then spray some cologne on. I'm ready to leave, but it's still a bit early. I sit down with my laptop and I soon find a new interview with Mick. Unsure whether I want to read it, I click on it anyway.

Unlike anyone else in the band, she really does have a complete career on her own, you know? She doesn't want to spend time in the studio, and she's doing her own thing. You wish for something else, but that's not fair after thirty, forty years of doing what we do. Everyone's got to do what they feel they need to at this point.

Great! Just... just fucking, great! That's exactly what she needs, Mick, encourage her! Ugh... Shaking my head, I slam the top of the laptop down. What angers me more is that Stevie is clearly speaking to him. 

I realize I'm gripping the wheel too tight the whole way to Stevie's, but I can't help it. I'm not sure if I want to explode with anger at Stevie or Mick more. Well, I know I'm not going to do that to her, because... well, because something tells me she's fragile, for lack of a better word, and I don't want to be a reason of her mental breakdown. 

Once I arrive, I don't see any unfamiliar cars and I'm relieved. I don't want to face the inevitable just yet. Before I get to the front steps, Alex is leaving, stopping to lock the door. He says to me... "Mom's not home, we can just go."

"Oh... sure. Where is she?" I ask, walking back to my car as we both get in. 

He hesitates. "She's with Christian."

"Would that be her new boyfriend?" 

"Uh, I wouldn't call him that. He's here a lot, though, there's not much gross PDA going on."

"PD what?" I raise an eyebrow, glancing at Alex, who laughs, before explaining.

"Public display of affection."

"Oh, well that's good to hear, I suppose?"

"For me, yes. I don't want to see my Mom all over some guy."

"How did they meet?"

"He's a doctor. After the last Fleetwood Mac tour, Mom went to get checked out, because she was constantly tired. But that's just it, she was exhausted."

"And he's been a round ever since?"

"Pretty much. In my eyes, they're not too serious. He did buy a her a dog." Alex adds nonchalantly, as I look at him again, when we stop at the red light. "But honestly, if you want to know something, ask her. With you two, you never know, what can and can't be shared."

I give a weak smile, nodding my head. That's true. 

We arrive at Alex's chosen place for lunch and after we order, he sits back, checking his phone, while I take in his looks. He seems to have grown so much since the last time I saw him or I simply haven't noticed. He is seventeen after all. In no way is he a small boy anymore. 

"So, what were you up to last night then?" I ask, taking a long drink from a glass of water. 

"We had a gig and way more people turned up than we thought. After our set, they were coming to say hello and chat with us, saying how cool we are. It's a great feeling." A small smile played on his lips. "I might have met a girl as well."

"Oh, gee. Don't." I laugh and he does, too. "What's her name?"

"Violet. She's eighteen."

"Now tell me she has blond hair." I joke, but Alex nods.

"She does."

"Then get ready, son." 

"I don't think there are other two people as stubborn as you and Mom on this planet. I doubt same fate awaits me. Though, we really just met. But I like her."

"Well, what can I say. Treat her with respect, that's all."

The food is brought to us and we start eating, turning to more casual conversation. 

We leave half an hour later or so and even though I know there's no need to, I ask if there's anything Alex needs, but he shrugs his shoulders and shakes his head, so we get back in the car and I take him home.

I wish we had arrived a little later, once I see Stevie in the arms of whom I believe is Christian. She pulls back slightly, before he leans in for a kiss and she responds right away. That cuts me like a knife. 

"Are you coming in?" Alex asks, trying to distract me. 

"I'm not sure that's a good idea." 

"He's leaving, you can wait until he drives off."

I shake my head, patting Alex on the back. "I don't think so. Maybe some other time."

 "Alright." 

We say goodbye and he gets out. I see Stevie saying something to him, before her eyes drift to me. She approaches the door of my side and I open it, though, I don't climb out. 

"You're leaving?"

"Yeah, I am."

"Is it because..."

"Christian?" I ask and she doesn't seem too surprised that I know about him more since the last time. "Maybe. I wouldn't want to be a third wheel."

"He's not here anymore."

I sigh, getting frustrated. Does she want me, does she not? She's always been good at sending mixed signals. "I can see, but there's someone I have to meet up with soon, so I better get going."

"Oh..." Her facial expression quickly changes to a disappointed one and I want to tell her that what I've just said is a lie, but... but I don't.