He stood for everything she was against and he wouldn't be caught dead befriending someone like her, but when the worst happens and they find themselves in a similar situation, only then will they realize they need each other to discover the anatomy...
When Icarus fell, I always imagined he looked upon the sun with quiet regret beneath his panic. As if he knew his arrogance had cost him everything, but still his lust for the beauty of the sun and the warmth and the open sky had been too tempting to give up. He wanted to fly higher, to hold golden fire in his hands and to melt away the cold cave from whence he came, off his skin. Instead, he underestimated the sun and the power it held over him, and it killed him.
I watched as the other Rosethorn, Caleb, tried his hand at flying on waxen wings, and I watched as he fell from the sky as his sun melted his wings. I thought it would be hilarious, but it only reminded me that perhaps I wasn't a sun, but rather the fool who flew too close to it.
I told Zealand not to get involved, but he was righteous, and loved to fight for the little guys. Abraham Coleman was a little guy with big guy dreams. Who could blame him for trying? But Farrah St. James was not someone you dreamed about lightly.
As Caleb plodded off like a kid about to get grounded, he caught my eye and his glower told me he was thinking about Saturday night. I tried to look smug, like I didn't care. But I did. I was afraid for Jasper and what these pricks could do to him if they pressed charges.
Pulling out my phone, I checked to see if he'd called. Nothing. Around me, everyone rushed to the double doors to catch the drama that was sure to ensue as the two love birds bickered, probably about whose family's beach house they were going to stay at next weekend. To distract myself, I followed Zealand to one of the windows that was covered in black butcher paper. He discreetly lifted up the paper just in time to see Ginger lift her arms up in annoyance. They looked like actors in a silent film. Her animated arms waving said, "I've had it," while his wide eyes and parted lips said, "I have no clue what is going on but I'm just going to wait for her to finish."
"C'mon. Zealand. This is bullshit. I don't want to watch 'the secret life of the entitled socialites.' We need to finish this project."
"Wait. Look." He pointed to the window and I reluctantly took a peek. Farrah was leaving, strutting away with tears in her eyes. And Caleb didn't even turn to see her go. It almost looked like he wasn't there, his vacant eyes staring at nothing we could see. And I knew then, that that was the face of a broken heart in shock.
I couldn't watch anymore.
"Let's get back to work, dude." Zealand nodded and we moved away from the window where the crowd had already begun to disperse, whispering their theories of what had just happened.
"I didn't expect you to actually come," Zealand said after a little bit as we moved from the gallery and into a work room. He was working on a photography project for class that would be showcased in the gallery next month. That's why Ginger Spice was here with her horde of Student Council nerds, decorating. Zealand had asked me to help him out with it and I'd agreed. I could see the surprise on his face when I actually showed up, but ignored it, hoping he wouldn't bring it up. No such luck.
"Yeah, well I am." I threw my bag down and went to get some of the stuff I thought we'd need from the supply drawer.
"Hey what happened to your hands?" He grabbed my right hand and turned it over, noticing the purple scabs like claw marks on my palm. I snatched it away and rummaged through the drawer.
"I fell the other day. Tripped." It wasn't technically a lie.
We worked in silence, framing the beautiful shots he'd taken. I recognized myself in a lot of the images, always in the corners and slightly out of focus, while the rest of our group made up most of the shot. I'd seen him taking the pictures, every time we were all together, but I never imagined they'd be this amazing. One image in particular made me stop.
Jasper stood on one end of the room, his head bowed over his cell phone, and I stood at the other end, looking right at him. The center of the image was empty-only the furnishings of the room blurry in the background. I remembered that night. It was the first time I'd seen him since the week I'd lived with him. He hadn't noticed I was there and I didn't go up to him. All I did was look at him from afar, until he finally noticed I was there. And I could breathe again. It was the only one of me in full focus. I touched my hand to the divide between us, willing it to shrink.
"That one's my favorite." Zealand's voice pulled me out of the memory. "You can have it after the show," he promised.
"You hate Jasper," I said looking up at him. "Yeah but you don't. I know how much he means to you. I mean...look at you." He looked down at the photograph. "Lost in love."
When the bell rang for first period, I didn't go to my calculus class. Instead I snuck out onto the football field, climbing under the bleachers, and dialed his number. I needed to hear his voice. To know he was coming back one day.
It rang seven times before I heard his sigh at the end of the line. "Santana."
"You left me." I hadn't planned on confronting him right away. Or through the phone for that matter.
"What do you want?" His voice was arctic. No apology; no desperation to explain, like he always did when things turned sour.
"I need to see you."
"I can't. I'm busy. You know that's not how this works." Works, he said. As if we were mechanical and could be powered down and restarted at the push of a button.
"Jasper, that isn't fair! You owe me an explanation." I had never been clingy. I hated that, but he was leaving me no choice.
"I don't owe you shit. We aren't shit, Santana. Don't call me again." And he hung up. The phone slipped from my hands and onto the patchy grass beneath me. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't move. Just like that, in the span of a single breath, Jasper had wrecked everything.
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Sigh. I'm having a little trouble separating their voices...are they too dramatic? I know I've experienced heartache like theirs and honestly that's how I felt so that's how I'm writing them lol I hope you enjoyed it! Please comment your thoughts; I love hearing from you all.
