The Anatomy of a Broken Heart //Completed//

44. Caleb

The road was dark and winding and I knew this had been a terrible idea. For a minute, I thought about just jumping out of the car and let her drive herself into a ditch. We hit massive holes on the way up to wherever she was going. It wasn't the same path we took the last time.

"Almost there," she said, squinting her eyes at the path.

When the valet had come with the car, she had extended her hands me, silently demanding the keys. "You don't know the way," she'd said. I hadn't thought the way was going to lead me straight to my death.

"Remember you promised you wouldn't kill me?" I said in a strained voice.

"Does death by car accident count?" she deadpanned.

The car finally came to a stop and I got out faster than I cared to admit. She followed suit, leaving the car running so the headlights lit our path. We were higher up than last time and below, I could see the spot where we'd stood last. The trees were dark, just an ominous shadow. Sanctuary, she'd called it. She stood on the edge of the cliff, so close I was afraid she'd slip and fall into the black water below which was motionless despite the breeze. Around her, I could see dust particles enveloping her in the bright headlights, like the smoke clouds she always wore. It felt like I always saw her through a screen, something always between us.

"Why do you like this place so much?" I whispered. I felt like an intruder here, and yet, she'd brought me twice.

"It's just quiet. You don't have to think here, or you can think all you want." From her little purse, she took out a cigarette, taking a long drag. I watched the thin paper turn to ash between her fingers.

"You want a drag?"

I shook my head.

"So what do you do, Caleb?"

I looked at her questioningly.

"You know. At school. At home."

"Uh, I play baseball," I said. Santana laughed.

"I hate baseball," she confessed.

"I do too." I joined in her laughter which had grown louder in surprise.

"Why play?"

I walked closer to her, into the stream of light, and shrugged.

"I don't know. It's just something to do. My dad used to play."

She nodded.

"I think my dad played soccer back home."

She took another drag of her cigarette and caught me looking.

"I'm going to quit. Just not tonight." It was like she was trying to convince herself more than anything

"You should."

"I will."

"I'm really sorry about the auction. I had no idea my mom would, you know, corral you into it." The memory of her anger still made me flinch.

"Don't worry about it. I was talking to your cousin and I don't really think he knows what he's gotten himself into."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I'm not exactly the kind of girl you take out on dates, am I?"

"Santana, I couldn't have survived tonight if it weren't for you so I'd say you're exactly the kind of girl a guy needs on a date. Or a pretend date." As I said it, I knew I meant it. Seeing Farrah almost every day for the past ten days would have been nearly impossible if I hadn't had this stupid plan. Had it really been such a short amount of time since I'd lost her? If I hadn't had this mission, I don't know how I'd have coped, and I couldn't think of anyone else better to have done this with.