Pride {l.s.}

47- Help Me

The Story So Far:

Harry stopped taking his antidepressants because it made his anxiety really bad. Zayn recommended checking Harry's blood for something like a Vitamin D deficiency which can have the same symptoms as depression. Louis got a strange phone call from Harry. He raced home to find that Harry had cut his wrist. Louis decided to call Harry's mom and talk to her about Harry's state.

Spanish Version Available: Pride | l.s. [Traducción al español] by InLarryLove

Harry stumbles into the kitchen the next morning looking exhausted still. I already called his work to cancel any jobs he had today. I've already made him plans for today.

"Lou?"

I step away from the pan where I'm making scrambled eggs and manage to intercept Harry as he gives me a large hug. He holds me against his body tightly as if he never wants to let me go. I can feel the bandages on his wrist through my thin t-shirt, and it reminds me even more of last night. I remember the tired eyes of his. I remember how small he looked. Most of all, I remembered the blood that came from Harry's wrists because he wanted it to.

"How are you feeling?" I ask politely as Harry takes a seat on the barstool that overlooks the kitchen. I go back to finishing the eggs.

Harry shrugs his shoulders. "I'm okay. I um am sorry again about last night. I don't know what happened..."

"Harry, it's not your fault."

"No, no, this is my fault. I can be better. I know I can-"

"And I know you can too, but we have to think logically Harry. Obviously something is wrong. I have a plan, and if that doesn't work, you're going back on your medication," I say. Harry opens his mouth to interrupt, but I continue. "I will help you through any panic attacks. We are fighting one battle at a time."

"What's your plan?"

"I called your mom last night. Kind lady. She reminded me of you."

Harry's eyes open wide in surprise. He probably didn't expect that. "How was she?"

"She's good. Very good. She misses you a lot," I tell him. "She wants us to visit so that I can be properly introduced."

"That sounds nice. Now stop avoiding the real question here. Why did you call my mother?" Harry finally asks. He doesn't sound mad. Harry rarely sounds mad; he sounds exhausted. He leans his head on his hands. I'll probably make him take a nap later.

"There are other things that can be causing you to be depressed," I reply. I take the pan and dump the scrambled eggs onto a plate. I walk across the kitchen and set it in front of Harry. I hand him a fork and lean on the counter to face him. "Your mother and I talked. I told her about how you have been seeming. I mentioned that my friend, Zayn, recommended checking your blood."

"My blood? Is there something wrong with my blood?" Harry questions in confusion as he takes a bite of the eggs. His eyes open wide. "I have taught you well. These eggs are good."

I roll my eyes. "Thanks, and the blood is full of indicators that can tell doctors if something else is wrong in your body."

Harry looks somewhat relieved at my answer. "So there could be like a medical reason for my depression?"

I nod my head with a smile. "It could be anemia or an iron deficiency in general, low Vitamin D levels, or some strange disease thing called hypothyroidism. Your mom set up appointments for you, so you'll be getting your blood drawn today. Because of what happened last night, they managed to squeeze you in."

"You're an amazing boyfriend. You know that right?" Harry says with those large heart eyes he makes. It makes my heart melt as I walk around the counter to reach him. I stand in between his legs and wrap my arms around his waist. He pulls me close and snuggles his head into the crook of my neck.

"I just want you to be happy," I mumble once he finally lets me go. Today has been a day full of long hugs, and I'm okay with that.

"You make me happy. I just... need something else I guess."

"I wish that I could make you completely happy."

"You will. We just need to fix this."

***

Harry does great while getting his blood drawn. I've had mine drawn before for donating blood, and I can see him taking my advice. I told him to try repeating something in his head such as a song in order to distract him. Harry's eyes are focused on the wall behind the chair I'm sitting in. I can see his lips moving slightly with whatever words are in his mind as they draw his blood. He doesn't look at the small needle in his arm. It's not the feeling of seeing your blood that is weird; I found the feeling of the needle in my arm a weird sensation.

"What were you singing?" I ask as Harry and I walk back to his car to drive back home.

"Don't by Ed Sheeran," Harry replies with a slight laugh. "It's like acoustic rap. There were enough words that helped distract me."

I nod my head. "I really like him. We should play him more often in the house. I'm getting sick of the same Fray album."

"Have you heard his song called Friends? It's on the Don't EP," Harry asks me as we both hop onto the car. I shake my head. "It's on my phone is you want to hear it. I like it... It reminds me of us to be completely honest."

I take his phone and unlock it with my thumb print. I go to his music app, and I automatically click on his playlists. There's the usual ones like "Happy" and "Sad", but I also notice that there is one playlist with two hearts, a green one and a blue one 💙💚. I sneak a look at Harry. He isn't looking, so I discretely open the playlist.

They are all love songs. I can feel my heart melting as I look over the titles of all of the songs I've ever mentioned to him. There's a lot of Ed Sheeran songs, and I click on the one called Friends. The beautiful acoustic music comes through the speakers by the aux chord.

I turn to look at Harry. "You have a playlist for us."

A blush covers Harry's pale skin as he drives. "I thought it would be cute. I don't know."

"You're sappy," I inform him,"and adorable."

I lean back and roll the window down. I lean my body against the door and get as close to the window as I can as the fresh air blows onto my face. The ginger's calming voice comes through calming along with the small acoustic guitar. I look over to see Harry mouthing along to the song with a small smile dancing on his lips. I close my eyes and let the words take over.

Friends just sleep in another bed,
And friends don't treat me like you do.
Well I know that there's a limit to everything,
But my friends won't love me like you.
No, my friends won't love me like you.

A/N

Please remember to get help if you're feeling depressed. Please do. Message me anytime also. All the love 💚💙

xoxo raindropkiss1