Super Rich Kids (BoyxBoy)

Chapter 27: Three Sessions

"Just a friend." He had said and walked away without hesitation. I wanted to reach out to Alexander and beg him to stay with me-- felt my skin crawling with unease as I watched him slink down the hallway, phone pressed to his ear.

Chance.

I'd never heard the name; he's never mentioned a Chance. Then again, I never mentioned Marshall. I closed my eyes, let my mind wander because if I pushed away my thoughts the only thing I could focus on would be the pain in my body.

On the good days, it feels like having a seriously bad case of the flu, on the bad days it feels like I am dying. My skin boils, and the constant vomiting has done nothing good for my weight. I know Alexander sees it. The up and down glances he gives me, and that haunting look of concern that licks my skin like a feather of a touch and causes me to recoil in shame.

It caused fear to level out my heart. Fear that whatever attraction he had for me is no longer there. I curled my hand, fisted the sleeve of my sweater and forced back tears. I wanted to pull back my flesh and wash my insides. I wanted to go back in time and never let my hands go near morphine or any other drug.

The way he had pulled away from me only moments ago, that look of unbridled disgust. He had tested the waters, kissed me to see if it would all be the same, but he must have been disappointed.

Feelings I still held were lingering in my throat mingling with the breath that left my lips, but nothing left his lips. I tasted no love, no sweet emotions, nothing but cold rejection. Something I couldn't handle.

Not from him.

Anyone but him.

****

I winced and covered my ears against the noise, could hear the pounding in my head, my body felt like it was being hit with waves of heat but I shook relentlessly, sweat to the point that I couldn't decide when I was cold or hot. The knocking continued but opening my eyes to the light was not an option.

Instead, I waited. The lock eventually clicked and soft footsteps could be heard. A warm hand touched my thigh. "Lights are off." I opened my eyes, felt comfort and love flood my heart before my gaze could meet kind blue eyes and a beautiful face. "Why didn't you wake me?" I shook my head, no words leaving my lips, but in my mind, I knew my own reasoning. Not only was it two in the morning, but I knew he would rather be anywhere else.

"Why are you awake?" Is what I managed to say through partly clenched teeth and a tense jaw.

"I check on you during the night... I have to make sure you're okay." I could imagine the blush lifting on his cheeks and I was comforted by the fabricated images caught in my mind.

"Are you blushing?" I managed the shakiest smile of my life, it lasted only a few flickers of a second and fell from my lips.

"You're staring..." He said, and I blindly reached forward, pressed a hand to his warmed cheeks. "It makes me shy." I wanted to laugh and cry and suffocate him in a hug. That's the only way I could explain these emotions settling in my chest. The quiet was comfortable, it compelled me to reach for his hand and lace my fingers through his. He reached out, one hand still in mine and the other traced my arm, across the bruise where the needle had punctured my skin, where the morphine was absorbed into my body. "What happened?"

"What do you mean?" I asked, nudged his hand away because I felt self-conscious over the whole length of my arm. Fear in knowing what I had done and knowing that I couldn't take it all back.

He shook his head, pulled his hand from mine in a gentle way that spoke volumes. "I mean what set you off? Was it... was it me? Because Abel, I never stopped caring about you. I thought you understood that I needed time."