How To Annoy People And Make Them Think You're Weird: A Guide

How To Annoy A Musician/Vocalist

1) Get them to sing a duet with you. When it gets to their part, sing, and sing louder than them.

2) If they're playing an instrument, sing a different tune from what they're playing. If they stop playing, scream: "Ha!Threw you off!" (A/N I actually did this and it made my day)

3) Serenade them. Instead of complimenting them and saying nice things about them, the lyrics should be everything you hate about them. When you finish, say:"I know it's not the best, I actually wrote it really quickly! I somehow managed to think of many things I hated about you in just the space of 15 minutes! And I could only use those thoughts from those 15 minutes because if I did, my song would have lasted way longer than the 10 minutes it already lasts!"

4) Whenever they speak in musical terms to you, ask them to explain it to you, even if it's really simple.
"What's a crescendo?"
"What's a staccato?"
"What's a tune?"
"What's a music note?"
"What's a lyric?"
"What's music?"

5) "So, I heard you play the drums, so I bought you a custom guitar pick! *places fingers on the recipient's lips in a shushing movement before the person even says anything* Shhhhhhhhh. No need to thank me, darling. It's my pleasure. You're welcome.

6) Ask them questions about a instrument they don't play. When they tell you they don't know how to answer the questions, either just continue asking the same questions, but make sure you word it differently, or say:"But you're supposed to know! You're "the musician"! That's your role in this relationship!"

7) If they ask your opinion while they sing, say:"Maybe you should sing a little higher." When they sing higher, tell them to sing lower, go back and forth, and you'll sound something like this. "A little higher. No, a little lower. Wow, way too low, sing higher."

8) Secretly go behind their back and learn the instrument they play. When you meet them, tell them you don't know how to play, and grab their instrument and play the most expertly you can manage. When you finish, say:"I guess I'm just a musical genius." This should work really well if they are constantly complaining about how their instrument is so hard to play And how it took them ages to get to their stage.

9) Don't you just hate *person's inspiration/musical influence* ?"

10) If they own any microphones, always offer to do sound checks on them, and immediately drop the mic.
"Check, check, 123, testing testing. Yup, sounds alright. *mic drop*