How To Annoy People And Make Them Think You're Weird: A Guide

How To Annoy People During Christmas

A/N: The song above is Please Don't Jump (It's Christmas) by Dallon Weekes.

1) Instead of putting a star or some other decorative ornament that holds similar value on top of the Christmas tree, put on a backwards SnapBack. Say that the tree told you that it's too cool for normal ornaments. Proceed to knock off ornaments and put sunglasses on the branches.

2) Insist that "The Nightmare Before Christmas" is a Halloween movie, not a Christmas movie, while at a family gathering. If you happen to know anybody who actually cares about this debate, argue like your life depends on it. If nobody cares, continue talking about it in an extremely enraged manner.

3) Bring up Christmas conspiracy theories in the midst of a calm conversation. Do not stop talking about them. Bring up evidence. Show the other person videos. Make a spreadsheet.

4) "I have a really simple recipe for egg nog. It's one part whiskey," *pours whiskey into a cup* *drinks it all* "I've gotta make another batch."

5) If your family hangs up popcorn on your Christmas tree, eat all of the popcorn strings. When they ask you why you did it, just say: "I can't help it. I love string."

6) *somebody gives you a ITunes gift card for Christmas* "Oh goody! I can't wait to use this to open your locked front door and steal all the money in your house to buy myself a real present!"

7) Give people gifts put into zip lock bags. Tell them you were just too lazy to wrap them.

8) If you live in a country that is hot all year round, go out in full winter clothes, saying that it's freezing and the snow looks so pretty. When the person with you tells you that there's no snow out, turn to them with tears in your eyes and say:"Not if you believe."

9) If somebody eats a piece of a gingerbread cookie, cry out and grab it from them, screaming :"Noooo!! Jeffery!!!"

10) Make awkward Christmas cards and send it to everyone you know. When you meet with them, insist on only talking about that card and how amazing it was.