TAINTED | Zayn Malik

Chapter 22| comfort

After half of the night spent on the floor, holding and attempting to console Zayn. I realized this was another moment being placed on our secret memories, most of them weren't exactly good. But I wouldn't expect much from a gang leader and a recovering alcoholic, this was as normal it was going to get. At least for me, I was still on the borderline of being alright in my own way.

I couldn't help but think it was a bit too late for Zayn, he's been immune to so much in his life. I barely knew the half and could tell that it's been a journey for him, part of me wanted to say that it will get better. Only I knew that it was a line, nothing will ever be the same for him. And it honestly made me want the best for him, ironically. The times I called him toxic for me, I wanted nothing but good for him.

I spent the few hours, rubbing his back and playing in his unruly curls as he practically cried  all over me. He was heavier than I was and I was only able to get one arm working freely. My other was preoccupied, so I laid there and hummed gently as he cried himself to sleep on me. His body covering mine, almost entirely. If it was another time, I would have pulled him and helped him towards his room or the couch in his office. But I was still considerate of being there for him, I got him in a vulnerable state and sort of felt responsible. At this moment, he was a priority and I knew that was everything to someone. It was something that I needed before, and never got it.

Being like that all night had many questions forming in my head, there was so much that I wanted to know. But I remembered it was none of my business, I was just there for the process of getting him through acts of aggression. When the sun finally rose high in the sky, Zayn continued sleeping rather loudly. It took the appearance of Michael, who looked bewildered at the scene to help me lift Zayn up.

We both carried him towards the bedroom, Michael fixed him up while I walked into the bathroom and grabbed a cup and two painkillers from his supply cabinet and sitting it on the nightstand on his side. The worst part about waking up from a night of self-destruction, you wake up confused and a feeling a bit defeated. That was maybe the worst part and I knew that he went through things no one else could understand, so I helped just a bit.

"You've been up all night?" Michael asks, pulling off Zayn shoes for him and pushing him into the bed. I stood to the side, watching as he fixed his best friend to get a bit more comfortable.

I nodded my head as I walked off towards the side, covering all of the windows with the curtains. Placing my phone beside him, with the time big and noticeable in case if he was confused once he woke up.

"Yep, somebody had to watch him." I said lowly, sitting at the edge of the bed and catching my breath. I didn't understand why I was feeling a bit responsible, I guess it was my way of repaying him for attempting at keeping me safe. It was the least I could do...

Michael looked at me surprised, probably trying to wonder if I was being serious. "Damn." He said, raising his eyebrows once he realized that I wasn't kidding. "He was going at it pretty hard last night, how'd you get him to stop?" He asked.