Out of Touch

Ava and Vinh

I waited to go to lunch with Matthew. I stood by the printer, waiting for him to get out of English. I noticed he was walking with someone. I stuck close to the wall. This girl was pretty. Her hair was a pretty chestnut brown and kept short. She had clear, pale skin and green-hazel eyes. She had nice curves too. I felt a small fire burn deep inside of me.

Who the fuck is she and why the fuck am I jealous?

She was wearing a gray, v-neck shirt advertising the Phantom of the Opera. The shirt clung to her, showing off her breasts and her curves. She had on high waisted black skinny jeans. They showed off her hips well. This girl knew what she was doing. 

I want to kill her.

"Hey, Matt." I grin, stepping out.

He looked up from his conversation. "Hey."

"Oooooh, who's this?" The beautiful girl asked.

I want to murder her. 

"This is Alina. Alina, this is Ava. She's a friend of mine."

I grin at her. "Hello!"

"Is she your new girlfriend?" Ava tries to elbow Matthew but he moves before she can get there. "Speaking of girlfriend, hey V."

"V?" I ask. Why would you refer to someone as just a letter. 

A pretty Asian girl rounds the corner. Her hair is long, black like most Asian people. She looks flawlessly beautiful enough to be Korean but the shape of her eyes says Chinese. Her eyes are dark brown. She wears a loose fitting white top over flannel skinny pants. A scarf circled her neck along the lines of a cute gray jacket. She's stylish and she's gorgeous.

Where are all these gorgeous people coming from?

Ava kissed this V girl on the cheek. They held hands and continued walking.

"This is my girlfriend, V. And it's spelled Vinh but it's pronounced V because it's the name for the letter V in Cantonese." Ava explained.

I kind of stare at these two in wonder. First off, I've never met such bluntly beautiful people. Second, I've never met real lesbians. Suddenly the phrase 'why are all the pretty girls lesbians?' makes sense. Third, I was jealous over fucking lesbians. I can't believe my petty self. 

"Vinh!" I hear Andy from behind us. 

So this girl knows Andy too. I stick to quietly walking beside Matt. These girls are so pretty, they put me to shame. I kind of wish I had someone like they have each other. Someone who would hold my hand-

I've become corrupted by some unknown force. 

"Alina?" Matt asks. 

I wasn't paying attention. "I'm sorry, what?"

Matt laughed. "I asked how you were today. You're spacing out on me."

"Yeah, I'm sorry. I'm doing okay." I give a nervous laugh.

"You don't need to apologize."

"I'm just a bit spacey and I apologize far too much. It's an anxiety thing."

"Ah," Matt nodded. 

"But how's it going?" I try.

"It's going."

"So that girl is your friend?"

"You wouldn't believe that she's the most annoying person in the world, would you?" 

I looked back at Ava. She was gorgeous. Was she really an annoying person? 

"Watch, she's going to ask you in a moment." Matt grinned at me.

"Matt, Alina, we're sitting with you." Ava insisted.

"You lied. She demanded." I smirk.

"Oh, just you wait." We entered the lunchroom. 

Andy and Vinh stuck together, having a good conversation in French. The two of them kept looking over at us. There was a bit of laughter involved too. I didn't speak enough French to know exactly what was going on either. 

Ava kept looking over at Vinh, frustrated with her lack of attention. She kept trying to get Vinh to focus on her. This girl did seem annoying.

I sat down next to Matt instead today. The lesbians sat across from the three of us. Vinh stopped her conversation with Andy. I almost felt like I was sitting down to an interrogation. 

"So, who exactly are you anyway?" Vinh looked at me, her face somewhat disgusted.

Am I supposed to feel insulted? I think I feel insulted.

"I'm Alina. I've kinda just joined this friend group." I give her a soft smile to hide of the high social anxiety I'm feeling.

"You seem pretty comfortable for someone who just joined." Ava glared.

"I guess I kind of just clicked? We did hang out last week outside of school and-"

"Whoa, you actually hung out with these two outside of school? Not even we get to do that." Ava shot a look at the two boys.

"Well, okay, granted, we just wanted to get to know her a bit more-" Andy started.

"But you've never-" Ava interjected.

"Excuse you, don't interrupt." Andy stated firmly. "We were just getting to know her before we let her meet the extensive amount of acquaintances this group has. We didn't know if she could handle the insanity that is all of you."

"Well, you've got your point." Vinh rested her hand on Ava's leg. "Well, Alina, what are you like?"

What am I like? What kind of question was that?

"I'm not normal," I put simply. My outer edge wasn't faltering but inside I'm a trainwreck. I'm so awkward in social situations.

I hate myself.

"None of us are really. You wouldn't know it but I'm on five different medications for different mental disorders." Ava leaned towards Vinh. "But why these guys? Why would you try to be friends with them?"

"It's not like we're bad people." Matt noted.

"I think it was more like fate." I lean on the table. "It kind of just happened."

"I don't believe in chance. And I don't believe things happen for a reason. I think things just happen and we're supposed to deal with them." Ava added.

"But isn't that a reason on its own?" 

"Oh, she's smart." Vinh smiles. "Welcome in. I know some parties here," her eyes flicked onto Matthew and then to Andy. "don't like Ava, so we won't sit here anymore but it was nice talking to you. Maybe you guys will come to the library for homeroom?"

"You know I've got music to work on, Vinh." Andy sighed.

"Wait, I can do that?" I ask. This sounds great.

"Yeah, just go down and sign out. You ask them for a homeroom pass, you get a homeroom pass. Don't skip out on the offer, you two." Vinh says. Her and Ava get up and leave.

"You were right, Ava can be annoying." I look over at Matt.

"You have no idea." He laughs.

"I'm sure I don't." I stand up. "Do you want to get homeroom passes?"

"I can't, I've got a meeting today. We'll do it next homeroom. And what the fuck, Andy. If I go, you go." 

"I'll go if I'm needed." 

"Luna will be down there." Vinh stopped at our table before walking away.

"Got it, next homeroom period I will go down." Andy nodded.

Luna. He was really in love with this girl.