Lawyer Levi

Come as You are

The artificial air of a June noon seemed the kind that makes one love life and all things under the beautiful clear sky. But unfortunately, I was experiencing the opposite of life and probably a secluded hell of my own as I sat in Colorado's office whilst he explained something that was not official or business like, just his personal perspective on matters.

I signed the papers, all of them 20 minutes ago even though the devil on my shoulder was urging me not to. I would not since the reason behind not signing the Alimony sheets were very childish. But something inside of myself snapped at the brisk moment when I saw her name on the form.

Then the epiphany rolled down on me like a landslide.

" Something has to change. Whatever it is, it has to change. "

I did not say more than I need to but sweated in my blue shirt and oxford shoes as I read the fine print for a mere 5 minute or so. Then I wasted no more than a few, inking the blank spaces with my jazzed signature.

Colorado was just doing his best since he felt the obligation to do so, being a co worker and all. But it just provided a migraine on the cusp of my eye brow when his soothing voice which was not calming but had the gruff of old age in it, started to send some suggestions about life to me.

" Graham. " He said and I soaked the shriek of annoyance in my socks,

" It might be better, you know. If you don't. . . .see someone for now. "

My eyes were fixed on the chink of opening in his window, just over the top of his head. And I was imagining exactly where my wife, pardon me, my ex-wife was in this hard, fast, knocked city and how she felt about it.

" Because, you won't believe me when I say this, but sometimes divorce is not the answer.

It is sometimes, for some couples. . . . but there's a number of times when he or she decided that they were better of together. . . . than alone. "

I nodded at the thin line of sunshine and cast a long look at my wrist watch to create the idea in him that, I was late for a meeting that happened to be pushing my luncheon.

Like everyone, he sighed and let me go forth to my personal demise I cautiously told no one about.

I was just about out of the door and I could not shake of the wind of change that blew like a nonchalant breeze over everything.

It was gone. All of everything of past four years, were just a reminiscence in paper and in distant memories. I stepped out, with my elbows supporting me on the reception desk and understood that if I did not change like everything was in a rapid speed, soon I shall perish from life.

I would walk around in the bag of bones and meat, deprived of a soul or an entity.

The lounge was empty as it was in every 1 o'clock of a Thursday afternoon, in a divorce attorney's practice. There was no doubtful husbands on the couch. no lawyers or bankers shackled by time and constantly checking their wrist watches.

And no tear stricken women, who once were happy wives but now just a colorless mind, trying their best not to cry and show their heavy eyes. Their heavy eyes, the evidence of their constant tearfall.

Then she appeared in the image out of nowhere.

I would not recognize her for the attire she was in. The formal office jacket was happily protecting the fluff shirt which let the collar die down just past the collarbones. The clicks of shoes were the usual sound everyone on this office ecosystem made so much that it had become a thing no one really noticed.

But her unscheduled stop on the edge of the office where the notebook, the familiar relic she carried materialized in her hand and my dull, coarse soul knew exactly of her intentions and her presence in such a place of our wretched life.