A Kiss From Lucifer (Mac smutfic)

Alone

The drive home was one of the longest drives Mac had ever made. The car was quiet as the sun set, and his house was just ok the horizon. He wanted to think that what he had done was the right thing, and it was, but he was hurting more than he'd ever hurt before. He didn't want Beth to leave. He wanted her to love him and to forgive him, but he didn't deserve her forgiveness. Mac knew that tomorrow she'd be leaving the state, heading back home to Georgia to be with her family and her boyfriend. Her real boyfriend. The one who wouldn't drive her to suicide. The one who actually acted like he loved her. She deserved him, not Mac. She deserved love, not pain. Mac was the one who deserved pain, not love. And he was getting it. He wouldn't whine about how much he hurt, because he deserved it.

He deserved all of the pain in the world. Beth deserved all of the love in the world.

Mac pulled up to the empty house, sitting in his truck for a bit. He didn't want to go inside and see all of the pain he had caused Beth. He knew at once he couldn't face the bathroom. Or the bedroom. He'd sleep on the couch and never move. Maybe drink his life away, being in a constant hangover. Yeah. He deserved that.

Mac sat in the car for who knows how long. He couldn't go inside. He just couldn't gather enough courage to go inside that house. So instead, he drove off to the Luna Mesa, where it was probably going to close soon.

He trudged inside as Walter has started putting the chairs up on the tables. He turned to Mac as he sat at the bar, burying his face into his arms. Walter didn't say anything as he pulled a beer out from under the bar, opening it and passing it to Mac. He took it and downed it quickly, his throat burning. And oh yes, he deserved to have his throat burned by alcohol. He winced before slamming the empty bottle down on the bar. Walter took that away and leaned down to grab another one.

"Want to talk about it?" He asked, handing Mac the beer.

Mac chugged that bottle down as well, his stomach burning as well. But it wasn't enough. "Got anythin' stronger?"

Walter brought out a bottle of patron out, pouring Mac a shot and handing it to him. Mac took the shot quickly, wincing at the strong sharp taste.

"You probably shouldn't drink too much. You don't wanna get into a wreck." Walter warned.

"I'd deserve it." Mac mumbled, taking another shot.

"What happened?" Walter asked.

Mac took a third shot of patron, feeling a little fuzzy and sick. "She tried killin' herself." He mumbled out, tears starting to run down his cheeks again.

"Is she ok?"

Mac nodded, but then buried his face into his arms, his shoulders shaking as he sobbed. God he was horrible. He was an awful human being. Beth needed to be loved, she needed to be with her family. Mac wasn't her family, and he never would be.

Walter leaned forward and rubbed Mac's shoulder soothingly, knowing fully well that if he tried to hug him he'd probably get punched. Mac sobbed for a few moments, before reaching over the bar and grabbing a bottle of whiskey, starting to chug that. Was he trying to give himself alcohol poisoning? He didn't know.

Walter however wasn't going to risk losing his son like that. He ripped the bottle out of Mac's hands and held it away, watching as Mac buried his face into his arms again. Pity overflowed Walter. He had no idea what had happened, but it must've been bad.

"Why don't I take you home? You can pick up your truck tomorrow when you've sobered up." Walter offered the intoxicated Mac.

Mac mumbled something but shrugged. Walter helped him out of his seat and out to the back, where Walter's jeep was parked. Mac clambered into the back seat and laid down, staring up at the ceiling. Walter sat in the drivers seat and started driving down the highway.

About half way to Mac's house, Walter heard mumbling coming from the back seat.

"Come over, come over are we both in town?
Come over, come over cause I want you around.
I want you, I want you to rip up my dress.
I want you, I want you to make me a mess."

Mac mumbled out, his arm covering his eyes as his body started to shudder again, and Walter heard little sniffles coming from him. He glanced back sadly at his son, who was trying to mask his sobs. Walter bit his lip. Mac really did need Beth. And Walter could tell that being without her was killing him. He wasn't sure what had happened, but it had to have been bad. He couldn't exactly blame Beth for breaking up with Mac, though. Mac had said horrible things.

He just hoped max wouldn't try to follow in her footsteps.