The first thing I notice when I wake up is the smell of antibacterial. My eyes flutter open and I see Blake holding my hand. I look on the other side and see My mom, Josh, and Ashley standing there all in tears. The hospital door opens and a doctor comes in.
"Looks like you're up. My name is Doctor Dallas" He says
"What happened?" I ask
"What's the last thing you remember?" He asks
"I remember chasing after Blake and....and falling down the stairs" I say as tears leave my eyes.
My hand automatically go to my bump but there's nothing there anymore. I choke on a sob and that's when my doctor delivers terrible news.
"I'm sorry but the impact of your fall was extremely hard and caused you to miscarry" He says making me sob. "We had to perform a stillbirth. I thought you'd like to hold your baby before we discuss your options"
"I can hold my baby?" I sob
"If you'd like" He smiles
I instantly nod and he tells us a nurse will bring him in before leaving. Everyone comes to me and tries to hug me but I push them all away. I look down and sob to myself. I put my hand on my stomach hoping for any sign of my baby but my stomach is once again flat. Not flat to my usual size but flat to the point where everyone knows I'm no longer carrying my baby boy. I sob harder and this time I let Blake hold me. I hold onto him as we both cry.
"I'm so sorry" I sob "It's all my fault"
"It's nobody's fault" He cries
"It's mine!" I yell "I should've been more careful!"
After an hour of sobbing I feel completely numb. I'm just lying in the hospital bed with my arms wrapped around my stomach. There's a knock on the door before a nurse comes in holding something wrapped in a blanket.
Liam
I start sobbing realizing I can't just wake up from his terrible dream. She smiles sadly at me and lets me take him from her arms. I cry even harder when his limp body just rests in my arms. I caress his head like he's the most fragile thing on this earth. I gently kiss his forehead as Blake takes a turn. I look down and clutch the bed sheets as I sob. After a few minutes the nurse takes Liam and leaves just as the doctor comes.
"I'm terribly sorry for your loss. But I'm here to discuss options...You can have him cremated or burry him and have a funeral for his death yourselves."
"What the other option?" I ask through my sobs
"You let the hospital take care of him" He says
"And what's that mean?" My mom asks
"We would have him cremated and then we would have a ceremony for only immediate family and close family friends to burry him in the children's graveyard in the next town over, only a 10 minute car ride from the hospital" He says
"Ok" I say "I can't plan the funeral the hospital can do it"
"Shouldn't we talk about this?" Blake asks
"Blake honey, having a miscarriage is extremely hard itself it'll be better to have the hospital to do it" Mom tells him
"Can I...uh...Can I take a photo of him?" I ask
"Of course" Doctor Dallas says "We encourage the family to take photos actually"
He calls for the nurse to bring him back. She lays him in my arms and I kiss his forehead before snapping a picture of him on my chest. Blake takes a photo of me kissing his forehead one last time before handing him back to the nurse.
I want to remember how my baby boy looks. I don't want to forget how beautiful his face looks. How he looks so much like Blake. Blake would've been a great father. It all feels like a nightmare and at any moment I will wake up and everything will be ok but I know that this is real.
"I'm going to keep you overnight just to monitor your health." Dr Dallas says
"What did I do wrong?" I whisper to myself
"You did absolutely nothing wrong it was an accident. Right now it's best if you try to rest" Dr Dallas says before leaving
"How can I rest when I just lost the most important thing in the world" I cry
"Beth" Blake says trying to get my attention
"i'm so sorry" I sob
"It's ok" He whispers trying to comfort me
"No it's not!" I scream " I was supposed to protect him!"
"It was an accident" He whispers as a tear escapes his eye
"Can everyone just leave?" I ask looking down
He lets out a sob as my everyone comes over and squeeze my shoulder before leaving. My whole body goes numb as I hold my stomach. Eventually all of the crying exhausts me so much that I find myself to fall asleep.
A flashback to what happened jolts me awake. I look to my side and see Josh sitting down with his head in his hands. Obviously my gasp gets his attention and his head shoots up. I can see streaks from crying stained on his face.
"How are you feeling?" Josh asks
"He said I didn't do anything wrong you know" I say numbly "I didn't do anything wrong" I repeat sobbing into his shoulder
"I know Beth. I know" He cries"What can I do to make it better?"
"Nothing's going to bring him back" I sob "I'm never going t hold him. I'm never going to be able to see him grow up and get a girlfriends, or even get married or have his first kid"
He lets out a choked sob as he holds me tight. I flinch when his arm presses against my stitches from the c-section they had to do from the miscarriage. After another half hour of crying in my brother's arms I fall asleep once again.
At the end of the day the nurses bring in dinner and I barely eat any of it. After dinner the nurses change my bandage. Around 9:00 at night Ashley knocks on my hospital door and climbs in my bed with me. She doesn't say anything; she just lets me cry on her shoulder. Blake walks in and lays down on the couch.
Earlier he went to my house and his to get some overnight clothes and a blanket. At 10 visiting hours are over and only one person is allowed to stay the night at the hospital with me.
"I'm her boyfriend I'm staying" Blake tells Ashley
"Well I'm her best friend" She counters
"Guys calm down it's up to Bethany on who she wants to stay" Mom says looking at me
"Blake" I say
"Baby" He says coming to me
"I need Ashley right now" I say looking down
Truth is, Liam and Blake looks so much alike that I can't even look at Blake without feeling guilty. Besides, I just need my best friend right now. She knows me better than anyone else and she'll let me cry on her shoulder no questions or words. Eventually I cry myself to sleep but not before I hear her let out a choked sob of her own.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Author's note:
Ok don't hate me I know that this is so unexpected and I honestly cried writing this myself. This isn't even how I imagined the story to go so it took an unexpected turn for all of us. Everytime I write I usually don't plan anything and just write whatever pops in my head and I think the story has only just begun and trust me there is way more to come. I love you guys and keep reading I love reading the comments and everything.
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My Brother's Best Friend
Teen FictionBethany Carrington is a junior in high school. She's a great student, she has really good taste in fashion, she even has the "perfect" boyfriend or so she thought. She also has a brother named Josh who is a year older. He has a best friend named B...
