Patience ➳ Shawn Mendes

Chapter 21

A week passed since the thing at the park with the girl and since revealing I tried to comit suicide. After that I barely saw Shawn because he had to go somewhere in the states for the finalization of everything that had to do with his tour. 

I was lucky like that, it gave me more time to find an excuse not to tell him but my luck quickly ran out when Ollie anounced that my parents and siblings would be going to Seattle for a weekend and since I chose not to go with them, I was stuck at home but Shawn was coming over. 

Ollie had asked him to come over to check on me and Shawn immediately jumped on the opportunity. I knew he was waiting to get me alone to get the full story out of me and I knew I was going to have to share it because he deserved it and he already knew part of it. 

I was just happy I didn't have to tell him that anymore because that was my darkest secret. I did think I could've told him in better circumstances than while we were arguing. It was my believe that you don't tell the guy you love that you tried to comit suicide in midst of a yelling fit. 

So Saturday morning, everything went a bit slower in the hopes that it could prolong the unfortunate events that were bound to happen. 

I took longer to wake up, I took longer in the shower and kept deciding to wear a different outfit before settling on dark jeans, a white tee, a yellow cardigan and brown ankle boots. I kept messing up the braid I was trying to get in my hair and I kept pulling out my earrings, only to put them back in, the same going for my necklace and ring. 

The breakfast I had took longer than I needed but I kept getting distracted by every little thing. I knew I was doing it intentionally but I also knew it wasn't going to make it not happen. 

Before I knew it, the door was opening and Shawn was walking in. "Charlotte." 

"Shawn." I said, getting up with my plate and going to the kitchen with it. 

After that, there were no words spoken for over an hour because I kept finding little things I could do or something to fix until Shawn grew tired of it. 

"Charlotte, sit!" He ordered. 

I raised a brow. "What am I? A dog?" 

"Charlotte." He warned. 

I help up my hands in surrender. "Fine." 

"Tell me the whole story." He demanded. 

"Do you have the whole day?" I asked. 

He shrugged. "I have the full weekend if needed." 

"Fine. I was 2 and a half months old when my parents took me away from my biological parents a-" 

"Wait, the Peeters' are not your biological family?" He asked, confused. 

"No, I'm a foster child." I told him. "Can I carry on now? Thank you. As I was saying, I was two and a half months when Dad had enough of how they raised me and treated me but even before that I spent more time with them than with my biological parents." 

"Why?" 

"I don't know but don't think I haven't asked myself that question either. But every question I ever had, I will never get an answer to." 

"That must've been hard on you." He said silently. 

"It was, definitely later on in my life. I never knew I was a foster child until I went into fifth grade." 

"What? How?" 

"My parents never told me. I always grew up with the idea that I was living with my biological parents. But then I found a letter from Fostercare and I had to open it, you know I'm curious. I read that I was a fosterchild and I kept it silent, Dad didn't know I knew for over a week before I broke and confronted him."