translucent [markson]

[Eight] Adjustments

It was only the second day of school and Jackson was already sick of it. Yugyeom and BamBam had gotten his mind off everything that was happening, but only for a night. Once he woke up from his subpar sleep, he felt the weight of reality crashing down on him.

His situation with his parents was something he could deal with when the time came. He had the whole school year to find a place to stay. What he was concerned about at that moment was BamBam and Mark.

Jackson knew BamBam well enough that he could tell what was coming. He was aware that BamBam valued reputation and what other people thought of him, so it was no question that BamBam was worried about being around Jackson. Jackson understood very well how other people thought of him; it only made sense that BamBam would be weary of Jackson's reputation. He just refused to believe that BamBam would actually go as far as cut him out, after all they had been through.

Mark, on the other hand, was floating in and out of Jackson's thoughts. BamBam was a constant worry, but certain things would remind Jackson of Mark, and it drove Jackson insane. Mark's laugh was stuck on repeat in Jackson's head, only not in the sweet way that it sounded like. Yes, Jackson loved Mark's laugh and how contagious is was, yet it wasn't the actual laugh itself that got him in a spiral of thoughts. It was what caused Mark to laugh that got Jackson questioning himself.

Usually, Jackson didn't let how other people thought of him bother him. Sure, it annoyed the shit out of him, but the fact that he never did anything to change their minds proved that it didn't matter to him. Mark was different, and Jackson didn't know why.

As he was getting dressed, he couldn't stop thinking about how Mark might laugh at his sweatpants or his hairstyle. It was Jackson's style: lazy, yet cool. Or, at least, he tried to make his style. He himself didn't think he fully pulled it off, but he stuck with its simplicity. For the past day, he was beginning to contemplate a change.

While he walked down the halls to get to first period, he could hear others whispering about him. People commented on the black skinny jeans he had only worn a few times before, and his hair that was styled up. Some of them were calling him "sexy," even going as far as suggesting some not-so-innocent actions, which thoroughly creeped Jackson out. Others were suggesting that it was all to impress a new "victim," as they called it. Though Jackson would admit that Mark was very cute, he knew it wasn't a good idea to get too hung up on anyone, especially that year. Junior year was meant to be one of the hardest years, academically, so he needed to stay focused on his schoolwork. He also hoped that, just maybe, it would maybe ease to extremity of everyone's teasing.

~

As the day went on, the whispers only got louder. His classmates had begun trying to guess who it was he was dressing up for, though there wasn't an actual person. Indirectly, Jackson was trying to impress Mark, but he told himself it was only to make up for their rough first impression.

In retrospect, his underlying intention of getting Mark to notice the change backfired. Part of Jackson had hoped that Mark would genuinely talk to him because of his less fuckboy-ish look. Instead, Mark had joined right in with everyone else.

He was sitting in English, a class he usually loved. Since he was already fluent, he was basically a teacher's assistant, along with Mark. Mark had talked to him briefly the day before, but only because the teacher forced them to introduce themselves in English. Jackson wanted to talk to Mark again, since he didn't have anyone to talk to that knew perfect English. When he walked over, he overheard Mark talking to JB, who was in their class.

"He doesn't normally do that?" Mark questioned, his head tilting to the side.

Jackson stopped walking, and hesitantly went back to his seat. The people around him were discussing what the teacher had just gone over in class quite loudly, so Jackson did his best to tune them out and focus on Mark's conversation. Jackson knew how creepy it was, but he didn't really care.

"No. I think the last time he changed his look was when he was dating this girl named Youngji last year. He bleached his hair platinum blonde. Honestly, he looked pretty hot. Obviously, he dyed it back to black," JB responded.

"That doesn't explain why he'd change so suddenly, though," Mark mumbled. It occurred to him that he had no reason to be so concerned about Jackson. He didn't know why it mattered to him that Jackson had dressed differently.

"Well... When he was dating Youngji, they kind of fell apart quickly. I'm pretty sure that he dyed his hair to get her to like him again, and it worked. For a little, anyway."

Anger flushed to Jackson's cheeks after hearing what JB said. Did people really think he was so that pathetic as to resorting to physical attraction to keep a relationship? The real reason he had dyed his hair was because Youngji had somehow coaxed him into it. Youngji was always telling him to do this and try that, and Jackson always fell for what she said. No one believed him when he told them about her, though.

"So what does that mean?"

"What people have been saying is right. He's trying to get someone to like him," JB stated, a sort of smug look on his face. Mark rolled his eyes, but chuckled a little at JB's tone.

"Who do you think it is?" Mark had a smirk on his face, and Jackson could feel himself frown when he saw it.

"I bet it's his roommate. That kid's pretty cute, who's to say it isn't him?"

"Yugyeom? No way. They're best friends," Mark scoffed, laughing at JB's suggestion.

"How do you know?"

"I met Yugyeom during move-in week. I can tell that they're really close -- too close to have anything romantic between them."

"Oh, you're roommate is friends with them, right?" JB had almost forgotten about teasing Jackson, confusion having overtaken him.

"Well, he knew them when he was younger," Mark replied, quietly. He knew BamBam wanted to get a fresh start, so he wanted to make it easier for him. Cut off connections at the root, right? "That and Jackson sort of needed help after getting stuck under a bed."

The bell rang, signalling the end of the school day at the perfect time. Mark and JB walked out of the classroom nearly doubled over in laughter while Jackson just about ran back to his room with the thought that Mark and JB were laughing at him.

Jackson hated how easily Mark could get to him. It hadn't mattered when other people talked shit about him, but it did when Mark did, for whatever reason. He wanted to tell himself that it was the fact that Mark had struck three nerves in the conversation, but he knew it wasn't only that. Something about Mark bothered the shit out of Jackson, and it was worse that he didn't know what it was.

After a moment of letting the day's events sink in, he gave up on trying to deny himself the truth. He had been so opposed to admitting that he liked Mark, but it was so obvious he did. He was developing a crush on a boy who clearly had no interest in him and was rooming with someone who wanted to "un-friend" Jackson. Those two things equaled a big stop sign for Jackson. Mark wasn't someone he could afford beating himself up over, especially when they needed to focus on school.

It was then that Jackson decided what to do. The easiest and most simple way out of his recently discovered problem was to hide it. All he had to do was keep the crush to himself and keep up his grades. Jackson didn't realize how hard that would be.