Back Story Part 4: Alex

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S-Ronnin

                Alexander Johnson used to be the black sheep of the family. He had his brother and his parents back when they all used to live in Neptune. His parents were never attentive. They weren’t really the type to keep watch on Alexander’s discipline. Alexander got lost in such a young age. He started drinking when he was in middle school. He was always with the bad gangs that fooled around a lot at school and at nighttime. Alex was thirteen when he first got to bang a young girl that was very like him, those who would dress and be prostitutes.

                Alexander dropped school many times. Even when he barely enrolled in classes, he hated going to school. The only thing keeping him from cutting class was the gang he was with. They’d always get into trouble and get sent to detention. He barely passes his courses because he never studied. All he got was his brains. Eventually, his gang started to become something like thugs. Alexander was going nowhere. He was nothing but a waste of pain, money, and soul.

                The only thing he was responsible at was taking care of his younger brother, Josh. Since their parents were home very late at all working days, Alex learned how to do shit by himself. That includes taking care of his younger brother. Maybe a black sheep like him would be found weird to have such a soft side for his brother, but that was the point… Josh, his brother, was the only thing he cared for. It was the only one he was protecting. His parents that were never home didn’t really matter to him anymore.

                It was amazing how Alex was different when he was with his brother. He was gentle and passionate, and not a single bad word could be heard from him. Even when he liked being a black sheep, Alex never wanted his brother to be like him. He didn’t want Josh to walk that path of a failure he walked. He had an ambition for his brother. Alex wanted Josh to be nothing like him. For his whole life, he never encountered a dream, but he had a dream for his brother.

                “It’s a little too late for me to change, Josh, but not for you. Don’t be like the failure I’ve become. Our parents hate me for what I’ve become, but they’ll love you. You’ll be the one to make our dreams come true.”

                Alex and Josh grew together. Their parents moved to California to work. Even when he was being financially supported by his parents, Alex felt alone. All he had was Josh. He would cherish every day he spent with Josh. After all, Alex could’ve gotten killed by the thugs he fought.

                One fateful night, Alex was already fifteen, and Josh was still eleven. Alex took Josh to a bar, not to drink, but to meet someone. Alex left Josh in the car and told him to wait. Unexpectedly, Alex came back drunk. Josh forbid Alex to drive in that state, but Alex was too wasted. He ended up driving very fast and crashing the car on a tree.

                Alex woke up after the crash. He was saved by the air bag system, but what he asked himself was if Josh, who was seated on the back seats, was okay. Alex went out and checked what happened. He was shocked to see that Josh was blown out through the windshield, lying on the ground of blood.

                “Josh! Josh!” He wanted Josh to answer. Alex kneeled beside his brother that was covered in blood. He knew that Josh wasn’t okay, but he just wanted to hear from his brother… even just for one last time. Alexander cried, “What have I done? I’m such a horrible brother. I’m very sorry, Josh.”

                “You should’ve known not to drink and drive. You always warned me not to.” Josh pushed himself to talk even with his dying voice.

                “I know. I know. I’m so stupid. That’s why I’m a failure.” Alexander continued to cry. “But don’t lose hope yet. We’re gonna find help, okay?”

                “No.” he insisted like he already knew what was coming. Josh panted several times and was evident to have had a hard time talking in his condition. “I can tell that I’m not going to make it. My eyes are blurring every second, and the shard in my stomach got too deep. If it’s okay, I just want you to hear me out. Is it okay?”

                “Of course!” Alexander cried even more as he nodded to his dying little brother.

                “I know I won’t make it. At least, I want to be able to fulfill your dreams for me.” He smiled even with his weakened voice. His eyes were tearing with the blood. “But I can’t do anything anymore. Then, I’ll tell you this new dream of mine. It’ll be our dream. Please fulfill it for both of us. Will it be too much to ask?”

                “Anything! I’ll do anything.” Alex shouted with his tears.

                “Okay. Listen.” Josh panted again but with relief. “I want you to be what you dream of me to be. I want you to stop drinking like how you forbid me. I want you to stop cursing like when you hit me when I cursed. I want you to attend classes and achieve like how you hoped for me. I want you to stop fooling around with girls like how you warned me with early sex. I want you to find a girl that makes you smile… one that is special to you. You promise to kiss a girl only if you love her, and I want you to live the normal, happy, and peaceful like you wanted me to live. Do that, and I’ll be happy that I’ve done my job as your little brother. It’s my new dream.”

                “I’ll do it! I’ll make your dream come true! I won’t fail you!” Alex screamed even more.

                “Tell mom and dad that I love them. And above all, I love my big brother that always looked out for me. Thank you, Alex, for believing in me. You’re the best brother I could’ve ever had. And please don’t drown yourself with regrets. This isn’t your fault. It’s just how my life was planned.  It’s my purpose.”

                “I love you too, Josh!” Alex cried on his brother’s shoulder. “Please don’t die! You’re all I’ve got!”

                “Even if I die, I’ll live s your dream for me. It’s like I’ll always be with you to guide you.  Please don’t fail.”

                “I won’t! I promise!” Alex continued to cry as his brother began to lose consciousness and eventually lost his life, too. But he smiled. He believed in Alexander to make his dream come true, and he’ll leave as his dream for his brother.

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