Tonight
I experienced the most horrible meltdown of my life.
In my eighteen years on this planet
I have never felt so emotional
lost
and completely broken.
My face is still puffy and red from crying and screaming so hard.
I think that it's because I finally realized why I am so unhappy.
I don't know why it took me so fucking long.
I've been keeping all of these toxic and shitty people around
surrounding myself with negative people that I cannot be myself around
people that cause my anxieties to increase, rather than decrease.
And for what?
What is the fucking reason for me keeping them around?
To be "liked"?
To say that I have friends?
No
nothing fucking matters if you yourself are not happy.
Nothing fucking matters if you are not at peace and happy with who you are.
Stop trying to be someone that you are not.
You should not have to try so hard.
Stop holding back
and stop trying
to keep everyone around
when they do not want to stay.
-C.D.
YOU ARE READING
Meraki
Poetry#44 in Poetry [4-5-17] Join me on my journey of self-discovery, my lows & my highs. I hope that I leave you feeling better. I hope that I have made you feel less lonely. This is me. This is 18 years of exploring my creativity, soul, passion, and lov...
