Am I Dreaming?

Chapter 21 ✔️

2 months later...

It's now mid-July, almost my birthday, I go back home at the end of the month. BigHit Ent. confirmed that it was just a rumor and wasn't true, that I was just a staff member, but the public still won't let the "BTS mystery girl" rumor die down enough for me to see the boys. I haven't seen or spoken to Hoseok or anyone from BTS in weeks. I've tried visiting, but was immediately denied and sent away. I miss them all so much, but there's nothing I can really do, except support them from a distance like every other foreign A.R.M.Y.

Things quickly went back to normal for me. Like most of the times when Hobi left, it felt as if a part of me was taken away. I just stay in my beehive of a dorm, in my shell; I get up, go to class, and back to my room to do homework. I might go out once in awhile and take a walk somewhere, or do my assignments outside on a pretty day. I really shouldn't let this get to me, but it is.

I'm so pathetic...it's like our trip never happened, like nothing happened between us, like it was only a dream...

But no, it wasn't.

I traveled across South Korea, and I spent a whole weekend with BTS, with Hoseok. I became so much closer with them all, I actually confessed—no, he confessed to me—and we even became a couple. It was so much fun, so beautiful. It wasn't a dream, it was real—

**buzz buzz** **buzz buzz**

My phone starts to vibrate, snapping me out of my thoughts. I found myself in my room at my desk surrounded by different sketches and projects. I look at the clock, 2:14 A.M., I must have fallen asleep. I soon notice my cheeks are wet. Was I crying?

**buzz buzz** **buzz buzz**

My phone vibrates again. "Ugh! Who the hell would be calling at this time of night?"

Now I'm getting aggravated. I pick up my phone and freeze, almost dropping it. It wasn't a call, it was a message. I stare at the name on the screen. Jung "Hobi" Hoseok.

I feel tears resurfacing and my heart starts to beat like crazy. I'm suddenly very hesitant and a little scared to answer. I finally open the message.

HOBI: Hi jagiya, I know you probably hate my guts right now...
Come to the park @ 11:30 pm tomorrow night. Please? I'll be waiting.

I just sat there staring at the screen. Re-reading the message over and over again, making sure I didn't misread anything. It was so random, I mean, why now? Why didn't you answer my calls or messages earlier? Leaving me in the dark like that. Why do you want to meet now? Maybe...he wants to meet up to end it—

**buzz buzz** **buzz buzz**

I suddenly received another message; immediately throwing away my negative thoughts.

HOBI: I love you, never forget that. ❤

***

The following night, after hours of talking myself into going, I'm on my way to the park to meet him. I should be excited or happy...but I'm not, I'm terrified. I'm scared about what might happen tonight and I feel like I could throw up any second.

Even though it's a humid night in the middle of summer, I'm cold. I'm shaking like a leaf.

Finally, I made it to the park and it's deserted, not a person in sight. I checked the time, 11:25 P.M. He should be here soon. "Oh my God." I walk over to the swings and sat down waiting. I was there for what felt like an hour, lightly pushing myself with my foot.