Telling's from the heart

The wars. Can and Cannot.

I can cry;

To fill every ocean,

Every river.

I can sleep;

Miss the sunrise,

Miss the sunset.

I can bleed;

Feel it burn,

See the new scar soon dissapear.

I can hold it back;

The anger only let out

Through screaming and punching.

I can write melodies;

Explain how I feel,

Shower myself in what I love best.

None of this will take away the poisin.

It’s been forever since I’ve been clean.

It’s been forever since I’ve seen light. 

I cannot take away the sadness 

Not when it attacks me each day.

It will be impossible for me to get better.

I feel so hopeless and numb.

I hold onto the dreams 

But nothing physical gives me reason to breathe.

Everyday is a battle.

Everyday is a war that’s been lost.

I can’t help but pretend

To act like a 5 year old-

So energetic and bubly. 

Then, 

When everyome turns around

I am back to face the bullets.

I can do anything to feel

Remotly better.

I tell myself it helps

But why am I still feeling like this?

A never ending darkness.

I can’t help but to cry.

I can’t help but to scream.

I can’t help but to bleed.

I want to feel better.

I feel like heaven is with me

But it feels so dark that I can’t touch it.

I can waste my days

Begging not to see the world.

I can live in all my fictions

Making new friends,

Exploring new galexies.

The only thing that has kept 

Me screwed to this cliff

Are the dreams that I live,

The music that explains

Everything I think

Everything I want to do.

So I lay here yelling.

No one comes.

I build a bubble 

And wish that my fear of death dissapears. 

I will soon leave

No one will care..

<4<4<4<4<4<4

Same routine. 

I have this new obsession of Mayday Parade <3 last month it was Bring Me The Horizon hehe. I also discovered this new band (thanks to a follower on tumblr) called Otepa and they are amazing!! 

"Life can do terrible things" -Mayday Parade's Terrible Things