I Mean It

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Gerald POV

"G, remember that paperwork you signed a month ago, in regards to the UFC using your song?" I bobbed my head as if I remembered, yet shrugged.

"Get to the point Marty."

"Well the fight is on tonight. Wanna check it out?" We had nothing better to do on the bus, being on tour constantly seemed to take up my life now. Between shows, sex, and parties was long times on the road in a cramped space.

"Sure..." I tossed my phone down and glanced to Grady who was playing around with his camera.

"It's suppose to be a good fight." He mumbled as Matt nudged him. There was something going on and I was the odd man out. Blizzy flicked on the big tv in the back of the bus and my heart nearly stopped. There you were.

"Tell us a bit about yourself."

"I grew up in Malibu but moved to the Bay. I learned jujitsu at a young age and continued to fight."

"Did you ever think you'd get signed to the UFC?"

"Heck yeah!" You smirked before laughing slightly. Gosh that smile made my stomach leap. "It was always my goal once I heard about the UFC and being one of 13 fighters chosen for the new weight class was amazing."

"You think you'll win tonight?" You smirked slightly.

"I don't think I need to answer that question."

The interview ended and the camera showed to you. Black hoodie and your face showing nothing but determination. For some reason my heart was racing in my chest as I sat up closer to the screen. I mean it started playing in the background, you rapped along with me looking at the camera just to say "don't get jiu-jitsued" then smirked. You unzipped your hoodie, leaving little to my imagination. I remembered every inch of your body. It was burned into my brain in the best way. The first round you spent murdering her. Her face was swollen from your constant punches and I knew then you'd find a way to win.

"Come on Ash." I mumbled, my eyes glued to the screen. The second round she'd got you a bit. Your cheek was a bit swollen. Then came the final round. I saw that fire I knew so well. She got you to the ground yet you dominated and soon enough she was out cold from punches to the face. "Yeee! Yeah baby!" I started clapping, even Grady was cheering.

"Hey G whose that?" I glanced at Devon, I hadn't heard her walk in the room.

"That's a good friend of mine from the bay." She huffed and I heard her walk out of the room. She was always the jealous type, but it didn't matter. I was too proud to care.

"We've got Ashley Davis here with us... Ashley are you satisfied with your performance?" Joe Rogan held the Mic towards you.

" Yeah, you know I wish I could have ended it the first round but a win is a win."

"What got you the win?"

"I came into this knowing my jujitsu was gonna be important. I warned her with my walk out song but I guess she didn't expect my ground game and boxing style to really mix as well as it did."

" Well congrats on your first UFC match. Ashley '12 guage' Davis everyone!" You grinned, waving to the crowd. Yet finally I saw the exhaustion. I glanced around and Marty was watching me before looking to the screen. He knew I fucking missed you. Hell everyone from the bay knew I fucked us up and you would have stayed by my side till death.

"I'm gonna go have a smoke." I mumbled before rushing towards the exit of the bus. Devon was hiding in one of the bunks obviously trying to make me feel guilty. I wasn't smoking alone for long. Grady wandered out and lit a cigarette before clearing his throat.

"What's on your mind G?"

"Is that really a question?" He shrugged before a chuckle escaped him.

"Your mom wants to invite her to a show this week..." The thought of seeing you again was exciting. It was like the moment before a roller coaster drops you.

" But...?"

" But she wanted to check with you first.... I think from your emotions towards her fight I got my answer." I chuckled and took a drag before glancing at the bus to make sure no one was eavesdropping.

"I won't lie... I miss her."

"I know... I never seen you grin like a fool before... Rumor has it she misses you too."

"What makes you say that?"

" She keeps in touch with Suz." I never knew that you and her talked. You probably already knew about Devon and the constant cheating. My mother always did have a big mouth in that case. My biggest mistake was letting you go and everyone knew that. I just refused to ever admit to my mistake. " She asks about you here and there..."

" You know what she said about me?" Grady shrugged before putting out his cigarette.

"Well when she called me... I told her what she needed to hear... That you made it out the bay and you were living your dream." A half smile played on my lips as I looked down at the cigarette between my fingers. "I didn't tell her anymore than that and neither did your mom... I don't think telling her you're a coke head and party monster would be the best idea..." I lifted my head slightly to look at Grady.

"Thanks." It was all I could say before we walked inside and went back to watching the fights. During the press conference they asked you a few questions. All I could think about was that I would see you in person again. How tempting it would be to kiss those lips and run my hands through your hair. Then again I lost you. I was no longer yours and you were no longer mine.

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