The Turn Around.

The Cold Reality.

That night, I surrendered myself to God.

Whenever I tell my testimony, I always get asked the same question.

"Christy, what was the first thing you said to God?"

There were no words.

What could I possibly have said to the God of the universe, after having my back turned on Him for SO long.

I literally cried for three days straight.

My eyes felt like they were on fire.

I was physically inable to speak.

Whenever I tried to speak my throat stabbed with pain and all I could do was croak.

I think of it as my silent vigil to commemerate coming to Christ.

I had come to the cold realization that I was truly hopeless without Him.

I layed out everything that I had that night and completely repented.

I threw away every single one of my knives and razorblades.

And I shredded all my suicide plans.

I wanted nothing to do with my former self.

I just gave it all up.