Faded ))(( Joshler))((

First Show Fears

Josh's POV

After Tyler's pep talk in the changing room about sweatshirts I got this feeling of being judged... being judged by all the people I'm about to preform in front of. I turn to Tyler who of course is shirtless and say "I don't know if I can do this." He gives me this look that is like a small confused puppy. "Yes you can Josh, You are going to do amazing... trust me". I gave him this unsure look "You know I have to go out there and one point I'm shirtless, what am I going to do?"  

Tyler POV 

When Josh mentioned that I didn't know what to do. We thought for a bit till it was 30 till showtime. He was now frantically throwing on his tank top and makeup. I felt so bad that I didn't know what to do about his wrist. I walked up to him with a wet cloth and took his wrist and cleaned them up again hoping that would make it less noticeable.  What I did, didn't help... it actually made things worse and I could see the panic in his eyes. He had this defeated look as if he was going to let it be like this. Jon Bellion just finished up his performance so we have 10 till show. Josh was panicking more than ever. Then with the worst timing Judah walked in and just stared at us. This made Josh almost collapse on the ground. "guys it's almost time for you two to go out, you need to get up there." Josh grabs his stuff and runs out. I run after him down the long hall. I finally caught up to him and grabbed him by his arms. "It's going to be okay, go out there and kill it for me. Please". Josh reply's with "Okay I will".  " I love you, never forget that". 

Josh's POV

Tyler just said I love you... to me, does he really mean it. I weakly said "I love you too Ty". I am now running as fast I can to get to the stage in time. I sit down at my drum set. I get my alien mask on and I'm wearing this really tight black long sleeved shirt. The music that opens us up is Blurrys part in Fairly Local. The first line of the album goes up, the crowd burst into screams. Then the second line and the third. Blurry starts his part. "Yo, this song will never be on the radio even if my clique were to pick and the people were to vote it's the few, the proud, the emotional. Yo, you, bulletproof in black like a funeral the world around us is burning but were so cold it's the few, the proud, the emotional!" Then it's all me my beginning drum solo before it switches to Heavydirtysoul. I was freaking out but held it in. When it switched I was so relieved. Tyler walks out and the weight is lifted off my shoulders. But then I noticed something, Tyler's voice sounded shaky. It wasn't the nervous kind of shaky but the crying shaky. My heart skipped a beat when he looked at me with red puffy eyes. I wasn't paying attention to where we were in the song and he threw himself on the ground and it scared me. I thought he was telling me he was giving up. I kept playing and he slowly got up and finished the song.

Tyler's POV

Before I went out on stage I collapsed onto the ground and cried. I don't even know why I did, I've been way to overwhelmed. It was almost time for me to walk out on stage. You can tell I had been crying... I hope Josh doesn't notice, or our fans. I was walking out with my tambourine and felt the whole vibe change people started screaming and cheering. I hope they did the same for Josh. When I started singing you could tell I had been crying. My voice was shaking. I made eye contact with Josh and threw myself on the ground. When I was on the ground I cried. Getting up was a struggle. After that the show went on like normal. Josh took his shirt off during Holding Onto You, I don't think any fans noticed. He did his normal back flip without anything going wrong. I went to go sing Can't help Falling In Love With You cover and I couldn't help stare at Josh. I think he noticed but that's okay.  

Josh's POV 

When Tyler was singing Can't Help Falling In Love With You I swear he was looking at me the whole time. That moment felt amazing. I felt loved for once. Our first ERS concert is over and it didn't go that bad. The beginning was kind of tense but then I just forgot about all of my problems. I was back in my dressing room. I think Tyler went to his to get his stuff. I was sitting there and this voice hit me out of no where "You did horrible, why do you even go on stage?" "You have no talent, no one loves you". This broke me, it hurt, it crushed me. It kept going, brewing, spewing, spitting venom. I started to have a mental break down. I went over to my suitcase and frantically pulled stuff out looking for one thing... my razor. I finally found it. I curled up in the corner of the room. I had hot tears running down my face, I could hardly see. I fumbled for the razor. Once I got it in my hand I brought it up to my wrist. I was about to face the consequences of being a failure. I couldn't hear the door open and close over the voice and my sobs. When I was about to make my first slit my hand was slapped away from my wrist. The razor went flying across the room. I looked up to see who it was and I saw Tyler's fragile body in front of me. He got down to my level and said "what the hell are you doing, don't ever do that... why didn't you try to find me." His voice was weak, he choked on his own words on the verge of crying. "I...I'm so sorry Ty, I got this voice, I couldn't take it, I had to do something about it, he...he wouldn't le..." Then I felt Tyler's soft thin lips against my chapped rough lips. At first I was surprised but I then kissed back. he finally pulled away saying "I'm in live with you Josh Dun".

Hey guys Katie here hope you liked the chapter tho it was all over the place. My friend and I have BIG plans honestly I can't wait. We are going to work on the future chapters tomorrow and talk about what we are planning so our chapters might be shorter it just depends. Well its currently 3:00 am so imma go to be. I hope you guys are having a great (whatever it is) Stay alive ~Trash_Can

P.S. I did not read over this so there will be mistakes I apologize.