Trapped by Emotions

Introduction

 To begin with, as a writer who still hasn't reached any fame, it would probably be desirable to introduce myself. However, you never know who your reader is, so in my opinion, the writer should introduce himself regardless of being world famous or just a local novelist, poet or whatsoever, everyone should introduce himself to the public whether you are writing your first or your a hundred and first book.

Anyways, my name is Matej Požarina, I am from Zadar, a small coastal town in Croatia, and although I am Croatian, I like to express myself in English and other foreign languages that I speak, more than in my mother tongue. Not only does it make my works accessible to wider public, but it's also useful to me as kind of a language practice. Since I love books and literature in general and I read a lot, I decided to start writing myself. My inspiration comes entirely from my heart, my emotions and of course, a slight mix of creativity, but I believe there are a lot of writers who get their inspiration the exact same way as I do. I am a big fan of psychological novels, philosophy, lyric or maybe a good fantasy novel like Harry Potter series (Rowling). 

I would start my introduction to this whole thing with a few of my personal thoughts, but since I believe no one is really interested in that, I will just begin with some simple, but yet ample introduction. This is my first book, or should I say, my first realized «thought», although, I am a man who sometimes doesn't really understand himself, but in spite of that, I will try to acquaint you with this as much as I can. Before I decided to write this first novel of mine, I have been just a poet and I have written some poems and songs. Most of them were for my former band that I had some time ago. I play the guitar, both acoustic and electric. I have also written some love, lyric songs, mostly for my ex girlfriend, who I honestly really loved, despite still being young, even younger than I am at the point of writing this, and, truth be told, incredibly naive. She was always with me at one period of my life that I will probably remember even at an older age and that definitely left a mark on me. Those were very hard times for me, but then again, it was a path that I had chosen to take on my own and nevertheless, I got a lot of experience by walking through it. 

However, you never know the way on which your life will take you. It would be quite odd to find an everlasting love at my age, everybody knows that youngsters are very sensual and more emotional than the adults and that love has the power to blind people and nobody is immune to that. You may always be the owner of your life, but sometimes you can't unfortunately be the leader of it. The greatest thing that life taught me is that one is never careful enough, on the other hand, it also taught me that you can't live without trust and love, you just need to be careful. 

Things that I would like to say about this book is that it will lead you through my mind and simultaneously acquaint you with some of my emotions and thoughts, some of them which you can't really discern in reality as you speak to me. Here's to wishful thinking that my not so keen readers of friends will actually take time to at least read this. However, this is not MY story, it's a story told through several characters of which the main one (Deim) characterises me in some way and other characters present people that were and some of them still are part of my present life. Furthermore, I believe many of you now come across an idea «How could I psychologically determine my own being correctly?» Well, the answer to that is really simple and it's actually answered through the process of reading this. It's not only introspection that helps me get to know myself, it's actually all the thoughts running through my mind and other people in my life that form my psychological being. However, to determine someone completely correct is almost impossible I am not stating that I've done it, especially psychologically, but I definitely tried. As a matter of fact, we all know that emotions are hard to keep under control and that it is almost impossible, however, you don't have to be afraid of letting your emotions out, you just need to keep your mind under control while that is happening. I will not inform you about the content of this work, neither will I give a comment on my own book. In fact, I will leave the readers to judge it on their own conscience.

Despite this being mostly a psychological work, there are also elements of criticism against «the modern world», but not only will I talk about its defects and flaws, but also its merits in some way. The idea of this book is that no mind, no matter how great it is, can interfere with «reality», everything around you is real and you must face the situation directly, one way or another, but of course, mind may not be able to interfere with reality, but you must use it in order to deal with that same «reality». Another idea would be the one I mentioned before here in this introduction and I will probably mention it dozens of times in the novel and that is: «You can never be careful enough and you can never trust anybody completely».

Right now, you may be under impression that I spoiled a lot of my book already in the introduction or stole you the privilege of interpretation, but I can only promise you I didn't. In fact, you may take this introduction as part of the story in general and interpret it on your own, whether as my rambling or otherwise, but I've merely given you enough input for you to decide whether you will turn the page or put this book away immediately.

No matter what your choice may be, I wish you all the best!