Trapped by Emotions

A Fool in Love

During the first semester of college, I was almost always doing the same thing, I was going to college in the morning, was studying a bit afternoon, went for a drink from time to time, I was training at the gym several times a week and I was relaxing with my friends and Rosalie during the weekends. Of course, I had some private time with Rosalie from time to time to share with her all the emotions I couldn't show and say things I couldn't or didn't want to say in front of other people. In my opinion, for a healthy relationship, there always has to be some private moments from time to time, that way, the couple gets to know each other much better than in public and company. However, not everything went so smoothly during that first semester, at least regarding the friendship. Actually, it was a matter of time when was it going to happen. Tom started to totally neglect friendship and all its value, everything that he had needed, he saw in Trixie, maybe I am not the right person to judge him since I hurt my friend because of Rosalie, but let's face it, Tom started to get on everyone's nerves, but only I had the guts to face him directly and as for my wrongdoing, I payed for it mentally, I suffered because what I had done and Harry forgave me, despite of what he heard. What I didn't mention is that in the meantime, he found out that Rosalie cheated on him with me, we had a small fight, but I just didn't want to fight with him and I admitted all my sins and he realized how big friends we were and he forgave me and of course, Tom and Trixie were the ones that told that to him intentionally during the past weekend, even though I wanted to admit that to him myself and then Tom got into a fight with me, where I faced him directly with the fact that I was holding deep in my thoughts. Of course, he was defending himself with the fact that I had done a much greater sin and that I didn't have the right to tell him anything. I told him that I could say whatever I thought about him and told him to face the facts. He threatened me with a fight, I couldn't believe he fell so low and that he had given in to hate so much. As we were fighting, I was very mad, but in the meantime, I just started to ignore him and I also blocked him on facebook.

He didn't mean to me absolutely nothing after that event. I couldn't believe that he had thrown away the friendship so easily, he did so many wrong things and I had actually never done anything wrong to him, except that I told some people what I thought about him and I was really sad that he had changed, but it was the truth and I was actually happy that it had finally been uncovered and that we faced each other. Rosalie wasn't at my side, which made me feel even more sad than I actually was, although she wasn't on Tom's side either, but I couldn't believe that she hadn't been on my side. Trixie was her best friend and she probably told her that I was stupid, jerk, a fool or something and that I didn't have the right to get in a fight with Tom so Rosalie just told me that we were both stupid. I explained to her that it was much more complicated than it seemed, but despite of that, she continued to hang out as with Trixie, so with Tom. - It was her cardinal mistake that brought a lot of different problems as in mine, so in her own life, as you will all see later...

Rosalie was a very naive person and Trixie manipulated with her, she was always telling her bad things about me and defended Tom, I was sure about that, but Rosalie never said anything against Tom and didn't really defend me so much, she was always escaping from problems and trying not to get into that kind of discussions, despite of that almost everyone tried to talk to her about it, which proved how naive she was. I guess she didn't realize that life isn't a game, although I was hoping that she would actually realize it if she had really passed through all that harsh things from her past and that she would know that life couldn't be so «pretty» anymore, so unfortunately, she is going to find that out the hard way, but fortunately for her, her suffering will be only on the psychological basis...

And so began our winter holidays and despite of everything, we searched only for good things in our life, but with wrong people...