Trapped by Emotions

Adios New York, Adios la Vida

Summer had come, the weather was beautiful, the sun was shining just as it normally would in summer, very bright, but to me, it seemed even brighter than ever before, you could say that it was symbolic since Rosalie and I passed through a very rough period of our lives, but it seemed to me that it was finally over and that we could finally enjoy the beauties of living together and carefree, as if we reached the light at the end of the dark tunnel. Nothing bad had happened since we got rid of all unnecessary people out of our lives. Furthermore, regarding those lies that Trixie had spread about Rosalie, I found out who was really «my friend» and who wasn't and I guess Rosalie found that out too (those who believed Trixie and Tom were of course, in most of the cases against Rosalie and me, and some of them consequently even stopped seeing with us, but as a matter of fact, there were some that we got rid of ourselves, although they wanted to continue hanging with us), but even if she didn't, she finally began listening to me and all the other people that were warning her and who only wanted to help her realize some things, so referring to that, my decision would be her decision as well, at least regarding things that were my concern as well as hers.

          Anyway, let's get back to the story. That day, a very interesting mix of events had happened, but before I start, there is something else you should know, something that happened several days after the conflict with Ian. Well, I don't know the story very well and the details are unknown to me, but it seems that Tom and Trixie really wanted to make my life miserable, since they always had that treacherous smile on their faces as I was bypassing them on the streets, as if they wanted to hurt me, but then again, they seemed afraid, probably because of the law, or maybe they even felt remorse, but after everything they had done, there is no place for remorse, I doubt that their anger and hatred against me will ever fade away, well, maybe in the distant future, MAYBE. To be honest, I also felt hatred, sometimes even murder used to come to my mind, but: «I'm not a psychopath , I know better than that foolish act.» – I was always saying that to myself when I thought about those things. On the other hand, man can ask himself: «Is murder really a foolish act that could be made only by a psychopath?»  «Is it not in our psyche to form those ideas in our head when we feel frustrated, angered, subdued?» Those are the questions that maybe even are not to be answered. One thing is sure, no man can be the judge of another man's life. Furthermore, as we speak about this, there is a rule to be mentioned, that famous «Golden Rule»: Do not do to others, things that you do not want others to do to you! – Well, nowadays, seldom who really holds onto that rule, but if more people complied with that rule, less evil would be done for sure, we would never be in the fog of war with anyone (except if someone really wants war). Moreover, I got over my hatred for those people and any other, there is no point in returning to the past and holding onto it for the whole life, to be honest, I had much more reasons to hate Tom and Trixie than they had to hate me, but I learned how to control hatred. Fear, anger and hatred are the worst enemy of one man's consciousness. As Yoda («Star Wars»), the movie character says: Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering. I never really considered that as something wise, since it was a simple Sci-Fi movie, but in fact, it really is wise, it is the truth. As a matter of fact, there are many thoughts about this matter, but man just has to continue on with his life, like Dostoevsky said: «If you're headed to the target in your life and began by throwing rocks at every dog ​​that barks at you on the way, you'll never reach the goal.» - Nothing more can I say, I think that he had said everything in that sentence. What surprised me the most, several days after Tom and Trixie convinced Ian into everything, they managed to turn Freddy and Marty against me too. I was shocked, Freddy had been my friend since childhood and after all, he considered Tom a better person than me? I couldn't believe that, I heard all that from Ronald as Freddy contacted him on facebook, Freddy blocked me on facebook and didn't even talk to me in person, he just believed them and left me, that was just one more reason why I couldn't believe anyone in my life anymore. Friendship with Marty didn't bother me, but then again, he was Rosalie's friend, she enjoyed her conversations with him, she could speak with him even about the things she couldn't speak with me about (cosmetics, perfumes, clothes etc.). Although it shocked me, I guessed that I could have expected something like that. However, they never turned Harry, Tony, Percy and Ronald against me. Actually, they weren't even friends with Ronald and as for the others, Tony didn't care about anything regarding that case, Harry cared even less and Percy was always indifferent to everything. – Smart act indeed, sometimes I admire them, Harry and Tony are people that maybe don't read books, don't educate themselves, but they are indifferent to everything and they do not care for anyone or anything. It is extremely hard to act like that sometimes, while Percy is just clever, I think I don't even know that man, he lives in some life of his own, introvert, but I respect him greatly. Well, that was the thing I wanted to inform you about, now back to that mix of events. Several weeks before our another year of college had come to an end, Rosalie and I got invited to a wedding. Ronald and his girlfriend Lorry were about to marry that afternoon. Well, I met his future wife on the day that we got an invitation. She is a really bright and clever person and she is relatively nice. Maybe some would say that she is even too perfect for Ronald, but I didn't want to be the judge of anything since I respected him, so we just came to that wedding that afternoon with smile on our faces. Rosalie was beautiful, she was wearing a black velvet blouse with lots of accessories like tinsels, decorative pins etc. She had a black leather purse and regarding her legs, they were naked, she was wearing only a skirt there and she had high heels. Her face was full of make up, she put powder, mascara, eyeliner, lip gloss and she looked almost better than the bride. As the ceremony had finished, we kissed and congratulated Ronald and Lorry and we were about to go on a feast. Just as we entered our car, Rosalie's phone rang, it was Marty, I lost my smile immediately. She answered the phone and he was in an airplane returning from New York since the holidays had begun. He told her that he wanted to talk  to her in person, alone, when he returns. He also told her that Trixie told him everything and that she had shown him some evidence about some things, then as he was speaking, it felt as if his phone fell on the floor and Rosalie just turned her mobile off. I told her that it was better that way, we didn't even want to listen to the same stupid things over and over. As we arrived, I parked the car and we entered the restaurant, it was a relatively big restaurant and it looked great from the outside. We were just enjoying the night, celebrating with our newlyweds, dancing, eating, drinking, it was very nice, although I didn't really enjoy the music, but nevermind, everything else was perfect. Food was delicious, restaurant and service were perfect and luxurious. Finally, the cake was beautiful and tasty, well, maybe too sweet, but I ate a piece of it anyways: We came home in the morning satisfied and went to sleep.

          As we woke up next morning, Ronald and Lorry thanked us on facebook, they left a message on our profile and told us that we enriched their best day of their life. We were delighted to do so. What shocked me was the news I saw at the «Black Chronicle» as I was reading the newspaper while drinking my morning coffee. «Airplane crashed into the Atlantic Ocean yesterday afternoon, something had damaged the engines of the airplane that was on his way to Europe, it happened around 6:30 p.m. Nobody managed to survive this tragic accident». I remembered that Rosalie got a call from Marty the day before at that exact time. I showed the news to Rosalie, she was a sensitive person and she was shocked by that catastrophe that happened, she almost started crying so I hugged her and we couldn't feel anything bad for a dead man, he couldn't do anything wrong one way or another, but the fact is still there:

«Marty Jefferson is dead».