Zayn's Maid

Chapter 59

Zayn's P.O.V

She clung to my shirt and cried hysterically as they tried to prize her off me.

"Honey I know your scared, but its too late," the doctor said, starting to get a bit frustrated.

To be perfectly honest, I had no idea what I was doing. I didn't know how to comfort her, make everything okay...cause I knew it wasn't.

"Perrie, sssh. I'm here, okay?" I said softly, rocking her in my arms.

"I'm scared," she choked, barely able to breath.

"I know baby, I know," I whispered, "me too."

The nurses scrambled around her, held her legs, her head...it was all so stressful. I couldn't imagine how Perrie felt.

"If you just place your hand here..." one said to me, placing my hand just below her neck, "and hold her hand."

I did as I was told and Perrie began to panic as they instructed her on what to do, I blocked out all the sounds she made and let her squeeze my hand. It was scary how young she looked and I realised why they had drummed safe sex into us at high school before I never returned. It wasn't fair on Perrie and it was all my fault.

"Zayn!" she screamed and I winced as the pressure on my hand tightened, my skin turning white.

"Ssh, I'm sorry Perrie," I muttered, a tear rolling down my cheek.

I kissed her shiny forehead and rubbed her back for what felt like hours. They gassed her and she calmed down a little, softly whispering my name.

* * * *

I left Perrie asleep and stood in the lonely corridor, slowly sinking to the ground from the fear of it all. It was gone like that, all the nerves of looking after a baby were filled with the sense of nothingness. It was like we had nothing left. I realised how important this baby really was to me.

I threw up and a nurse came to clean me up as I sat silently, going over everything I had done wrong, the time I had wasted.

"I'm very sorry for your loss," she said before scurrying off.

I sat outside Perrie's room before a doctor told me to leave, his eyes dark and baggy.

She was still asleep with a sad look on her face, her body looking tangled and limp under the thin sheets. I kissed her cheek softly and tucked her hair behind her ear, feeling guilty for leaving her. But if I had stayed in that hospital any longer I think I would have ended up in a bed myself.

I fell into the car, my hands placed firmly on the steering wheel. My chest ached and my eyes felt heavy, a tear running down my cheek.

I broke down.

I rubbed my temple and eyes, taking a deep breath to gain some composure. It was gone and there was nothing I could do about it.