Insecurities

Nothing Or Something?

It was yet another morning at the university, Barry sat in the library, this time however not doing work, and just simply reading a book, waiting for Caitlin to arrive. He was unable to stop thinking about the day prior, where the two had met up for the day, where they had kissed. It had happened so fast, so out of nowhere that Barry was fairly unsure what to think. It had certainly felt special, yet in a way, there was a small chance that it may have happened too fast. He wasn't complaining, and hopefully, Caitlin felt the same way about this, but he also felt that the pair were not ready for a relationship, that maybe they needed to get to know one another a bit more first. It was only a thought, but he couldn't help but think it. However, he wasn't saying that he didn't enjoy Caitlin's company, not at all. He loved having her around, more than anything, it was simply because neither of them had ever been in a proper relationship before, and maybe they should take this thing that they had together a bit slower.

It was at this moment that Caitlin walked into the library, a fresh smile on her face, as she walked over and sat next to Barry.

"Hey!" she said enthusiastically.

"Hey," he replied, a new smile forming on his face.

"How are you?"

"I'm good, thanks," Barry replied, looking over at Caitlin to his right.

"How about you?"

"I'm good as well," she replied with a smile.

"I have been thinking a lot about yesterday," Caitlin mentioned, a slight blush appearing on her face as she said it.

"Me too," Barry said, smiling at the thought of the day before.

"You know, we should talk about it more, how about we meet at that bench in the plaza this lunch?"

"Yeah, sure," he replied before the duo walked in their separate ways to their lessons.

As Caitlin walked to her lesson, she couldn't help but think whether the right decision was made yesterday. She loved it, she had loved the entire day, just as she loved spending time with Barry, however, she wasn't so sure if she was ready for a relationship yet. However, this didn't mean in the slightest, the kiss they had shared was certainly something, but maybe it wasn't meant to mean anything. She really wanted to talk to Barry about this, however, she would have to wait a couple of hours before she would see him again, and at the same time, she would have to figure out how to talk to him about it without making it seem that she didn't enjoy it or something along those lives. She loved his presence and spending time with him, very little would change her mind about that. Over the next few hours, she decided to try her best to come up with a way to explain her trail of thought.

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Caitlin had walked on over to the bench she asked Barry to meet her at, and not long after she saw him walking over to her, looking up and smiling at her. As he reached her, he sat down next to her, greeting her with "Hey,"

"Hey, how was your morning?"

"It was okay, thanks, how about you?"

"Good enough, nothing great happened," she replied.

"So, what do you want to talk about?" Barry said, sounding as if he was hinting at something.

"Well, I just had something that I have been thinking about a lot, and wanted to talk to you about, if that is okay,"

"Of course it is, take it away,"

Caitlin took a deep breath, before speaking up.

"Well, I was thinking about our kiss yesterday. Before I continue I just want to clarify that I loved everything about yesterday, nothing will ever change that," she smiled to herself, before continuing. 

"Basically, I'm not quite sure if we are ready for a relationship yet. I'm not sure if it is just me, but I just feel that we should take things slower, maybe get to know each other a bit better first. It was really something, don't get me wrong, but I feel that maybe we should forget about it for a while and just take things slowly, and then maybe, some day in the future we could start something like that," she paused for a moment, "Sorry, I... I don't know what I'm saying,"

"It's okay, Caitlin. I was actually thinking something similar. Maybe we should just think of it as nothing for now, and starting from now we can perhaps if you would like it, start taking things slowly, getting to know each other, and then, maybe, yeah, something may happen in the future. If that is something that you would like," Barry finished, smiling over at Caitlin.

"Perhaps, yeah," she smiled, looking back at Barry, getting temporarily caught in his gaze. 

"Thank you, Barry, I honestly spent the morning panicking that you were going to hate me for saying that,"

"Why on Earth would I hate you?"

"Well, I know you will deny this but I'm not exactly a great person, especially considering what I just said,"

"Caitlin, you have perfect reasoning and I was thinking the same thing as well, it's not wrong, it's perfectly fine," he finished with a smile.

They looked each other in the eye and smiled, letting their thoughts take over for a moment.

Caitlin was thinking about everything that was just said, wondering if the correct choice was just made. Perhaps their kiss wasn't nothing, and it was perhaps certainly something. However, she put this thought away, as considering everything previously said it was a fairly contradictory point.

"Okay, thank you," Caitlin replied, resting her head on Barry's shoulder. This caused Barry to smile, as this was a feeling he enjoyed, having Caitlin cuddled up to him on his shoulder. He rested his head on hers.

The pair were simply cuddled up together on the bench, smiling at the fact that they had both found someone that understood them, something that had never happened for either of them previously. What had happened the day before made the pair extremely happy, and if anything brought them even closer together. Despite their previous conversation thoughts took over their brains, telling them things that neither expected. Only time would tell what is to come...