waiting for the right moment

chapter five

Fire

   Love is not merely a feeling it is a choice. You choose to go for it, to guide yourself purely well, or to protect yourself. People usually protect themselves from pain, but they aren't recognizing the protection of love that they are building.

   Two people can get the best out of each other; two people may destroy each other, and two people may change each other. It was the weekend when me and Aiden were going to do an event for little kids, we have been planning for it for about two weeks.

   For my love to do art, his love for kids, and the kindness we both held it made an event. Our parks were crowded with refugees and little kids that look up for small things like coloring their faces or having some candy to taking photos. We planned it really well and worked for it so good, the two of us looked through the week days for the weekend with the kids. We wanted to share happiness among people. Yet, I ruined everything that day.

  From the childhood I held I think I always ruined everything. I'm a destructive human being and I hate myself for that. It's like everything I lay my eyes on runs away. You know the thing is that I'm the one responsible for that. Over thinking is what drives me to this.

  Dear human beings, do not judge people, do not hate on them, simply don't be humans. Since we human beings only damage things.

  I messed it up really well. My parents thought the two of us loved each other and had gone into a relation, but no we were just best friends for now, we hadn't share anything. I explained everything to my parents, thank god they understood. Well, my parents aren't that close minded but all people may misunderstand things sometimes.

  I stopped talking to him as they ordered, I shut my phone down and did as they said. It was really painful to lose someone that had been this close to you and this special.

   The next day, I got to the tutoring center and I saw him there. A new hair cut, the shirt I like, and his classy style. But I didn't talk to him because I didn't know what to say I was speechless and sick. When we finished, my teacher who is so close to me and who I consider my big brother; Alexander; told me that he wants us to have some talk. I sat down there, the first spoken word was 'what happened', my first reaction was to cry. Tears spilled down my cheeks at the loss of someone in my life. Someone that I knew was a one within me. We needed to find a solution for this so we called Aiden in.

  We sat down on a table of three, and all what we could do was to look at each other, at the broken souls that was caused by separation. Yes, one person can mean a lot to you more than you think. You only value the things you have until you lose them. What if it was losing them completely? The conversation below was said:

"What happened" said Alexander.

"We can't figure out what happened". We both replied.

"We both are so close to each other, we cant figure out what it is, feelings I think." Said Aiden

"All what I know that when we look at each other, it lasts a lot we can't even know how much, and we don't know why." I said.

"yeah, I think we are connected in some way. Could two souls connect?" he said.

"I think so, like you change me, you made me fearless."

"Sue..."

"yes?"

"you make me feel again."

"Well, with this it kind of settles here. You both have feelings for each other and all you both can do is keep that love inside of you, let it grow through the years without sharing it and when you're big enough to make your choice. This would be the moment." Said Alexander

"but how?" we both said.

"try." Alexander replied.

"So what are we going to do?" we said

"keep each other as best friend now, and wait for the right moment."