Changing Emotions

Part 20

*Patten pov*

Books aren't really my thing. I mean I like the coloring and children's story books but that's about it. Logan's the only one that actually comes in here. He even has his own secluded corner. I peeked threw what he had and he was reading books about emotions and repression. Though I didn't understand most of it I realized he was missing a few things. I would know, basically being an emotion. He is only learning the basics of what the emotion is and what it feels like. But not about what it means. Also repression in a temporary thing. We learned that with being gay and all. He needs emotion removal. I read about it before. It's supposed to hurt a bit but it's better than him dieing. I grabbed my headphones and put them in. This is gonna take awhile. Going threw the library is like visiting the Louvre. The largest museum in the world. I don't even know where the section I'm looking for is. But I have to do this, for Logan.

*Logan pov*

Having slight deja vu right now. Roman explained that they weren't playing hide and seek. And as far as he could tell Anxiety is fine for the time being. Yes I checked my closet. And noticed that a few of my sweaters are missing. I think I'm just gonna let him keep them. They probably suit him better anyway. Where could he possibly be? "Patton!?" Nothing. I sighed. "We can't waste time searching for him. Time is of the essence." I turned to Roman. He was being as unhelpful as ever. And annoying as ever. "And we need him to help Anxiety. Therefore searching for him does not qualify as a waste of time." He rolled his eyes. I turned around and continued walking. "Keep telling yourself that." He mumbled under his breath. I turned back around facing him. "You want to discuss this? I thought we came to a consensus that we require Patten to fully generate a plan to assist Anxiety." He looked extremely uncomfortable with a touch of frustrated. "You're being emotional." A part of me panicked but I pushed it down before it could show. "Roman I am incapable of feeling. Even you know that." He stood closer. I felt a discomfort and fear but again pushed it down. "You might want to close doors when you share secrets. The mind palace has very little sound proofness and a slight echo." I withheld an emotional response. He overheard. It was a stupid thing to even admit it to Patten. I don't even know why I did. When he asked no part of me felt inclined to lie. "Because of your little accident the mind must have changed me to compensate for the loss. Well that's as far as I can tell. So if any of us has a right to be angered it's me. Now we are gonna find Patten. Help Anxiety. And forget this. Understand?" I didn't give him time to respond before turning around and rushing off. When you think about it me having emotions is all his fault. He caused the incident and that is when they began. So he has no right to be aggravated by me not telling him.

*Ronan pov*

My fault. I already know that. My one and only mistake was worse than I thought. Of course it has to affect everyone. Doesn't it hurt me enough already? Nobody else needs to suffer over my mistake and my selfishness.

*Thomas pov*

My phone was constantly buzzing. I covered my ears. It's been ringing for awhile now. I threw it to the foot of the couch. Better. It suddenly started ringing I screamed and just kicked it off the couch. It went silent. Finally. I'm feeling worse as the day goes on. I can't even summon anyone but Anxiety. But I want to be alone. Alone to mope and feel terrible. And the constant people messaging me is getting annoying. I know they're just worried and don't mean any harm but, I seriously can't take any of it right now. I groaned as I started crying again. What is wrong with me?!