Sad Supernatural Imagines

#9 Sam - I'm not okay

Y/N p.o.v:

You always had depression since you were little. It had gotten worse ever since your parents died. Yes, they abused you, but you still loved them. Sam never knew this and you didn't want him to. Usually, you were able to cover up the sadness and pain with a fake smile, but some days were harder than the others. Today was one of them. You stayed in your room. You were lucky to have a built in bathroom. You didn't go out to eat or get a drink. You didn't find the motivation to. You were lying in your bed when you heard a knock on your door. You knew that it was Sam because Dean never knocked.
"Are you okay?" Sam asked. You looked at the doorknob to make sure it was locked.
"I'm fine, Sam. Now go away." You mumbled. You heard a sigh from the other side of the door.
"Y/N, you have to eat something." He said soft voice. Most of the time he was able to get you to unlock the door and get out of your room. Today was not one of those times.
"I'm not hungry." You said.
"I know, but I don't want you to die from starvation. Even when you aren't this way, you barely eat." He told you.
"Just go away! I said I was fine!" You yelled. Sam sighed again. You him finally walk away. You knew he was going to pick lock the door. It was a good thing that one day while they were away on a hunt, you decided to stay behind and install a pad lock just for this exact reason. You heard your doorknob jiggle and then some clicking. You looked up to see the doorknob turn.
"Really, Y/N! Come on!" A voice groaned. That was Dean. You frowned even though he couldn't see it.
"Once you respect my need to be alone, I'll respect your need of pie." You grumbled. Dean groaned again.
"Sam, is really worried about you, Y/N." He said.
"I don't care. He has no reason to be. Now go the fuck away!" You yelled.
"I'm going to break down the door whether you like it or not!" He yelled back.
"This is why I don't trust you guys a lot! All you do is pry at me if I'm okay or if something is wrong. Well, I'm sick of it!" You fired. It had gotten to the point where you said something that you never meant for them to know.
"You don't trust us?" He asked through the door. Tears had made their way down your cheeks.
"If you don't trust me then why should I trust you." You whispered. You didn't think he heard you until you heard a sigh and footsteps walk away from your door.
'I didn't mean to hurt his feelings. I fucked up like I always do.' You thought. You heard someone clear their throat and then a knock. Well, Sam was here.
"Please open the door." Sam said softly. You choked back a sob so he couldn't hear you.
"I don't want to." You said in a quivering voice.
"Please?" He pleaded. You whimpered. Sam had this way that let him get whatever he wanted. It always worked with you.
"I don't want you to see me like this." You whispered.
"Y/N, I won't judge you. Just open the door. I won't even make you talk about anything." He said. Tears were cascading down your cheeks. You got up and walked towards the door. You hesitated before grabbing the key off of your dresser and unlocking the pad lock. You pulled it off and put the key and lock on your dresser. You stumbled back to your bed and hid under the covers. You heard your door open and then shut.
"I'm not okay, Sammy. I'm not okay." You whispered. You felt the bed dip and looked over at where Sam sat. You were still crying and couldn't seem to stop. He looked back at you and frowned.
"Your eyes are too pretty for tears." He said. You looked away.
"Crying is only way my eyes speak when my mouth can't explain how things made my heart broken." You said quietly. You looked up again and saw Sam smile sadly.
"Behind every beautiful thing, there is some kind of pain. It's okay not to be okay." He said. You smiled and sniffed. You sat up and looked at the blanket.
"You've always been there for me, Sam. I don't know how to say this, but I love you. A lot. You have been there to pick me up and wipe away my tears. You always know the right thing to say. It made me fall pretty hard. I get it if you don't think of me that way." You whispered.
"It's a good thing I share the same feelings because before I met you, I didn't know what it was like to look at someone and smile for no reason." You looked up and smiled. Sam moved closer to you and cupped your cheek. He leaned forward and pressed his lips softly to yours. You kissed him back instantly. You broke away with a quiet gasp.
"I've wanted to do that for a long time." You said and laughed softly. Sam chuckled and pulled you into a warm embrace.
"I love you, Y/N." He whispered. You smiled and cuddled into his chest.
"I love you, too, Sam." You whispered back.

A/N:

Could this have gotten any worse..