[Ereri] The Screams that Saved my Sanity

6-What You Do to Me

-Levi's POV-

I woke up again with sweat rolling down my face and heaving. It was Saturday so I didn't have work. After brushing my teeth and washing my face I went to the kitchen to make breakfast. I wonder if I have any eggs left. I looked in the fridge and sure enough I have four eggs left. Good enough. I wonder if Eren likes eggs. I shook my head. I need to stop thinking about this brat.

Yesterday I was so lucky I had a mask on. When he came out of the shower I was blushing like crazy. His towel was tied loosely around his waist and water trickled down his face. He had a six pack too so that didn't help. This damn brat is making me question everything. Last night I almost socked him right in the face. Punching would most likely have lead to severely beating him. He made me so mad. The question was so stupid. I couldn't help it. I felt my hands tremble in anticipation. Some sick part of my mind couldn't wait to hit him. But I didn't.
I couldn't.
I looked at his eyes. I watched as he turned his head away in fear. I looked at his hands and saw the bandages covering his wounds.
The wounds that I caused.
And at that moment I realized I didn't want to cause another one.
The longest I've gone without...doing that...is two months. After two months I can't function anymore. My hands tremble and I can't think straight. After last night I decided that I'm going to wait two months before I touch the kid again. It may be a slight stretch but I'd rather wait until the last possible minute. Either way I'll have to do.
Even if I don't want to.
Always when I don't want to.

I finished frying the eggs and I put them on some slices of toast. I grabbed a water bottle, put on my mask, and unlocked the basement door. Eren was still sleeping and he had his head rested on his own shoulder with the blanket still around him. Beautiful. For a few minutes I just looked at him while he slept. The way his slow breathing moved the blanket up and down had me mesmerized. I walked up to him and lightly shook him awake.
"Hey, brat wake up." He slowly opened his eyes and jumped when he saw me.

"AH! Oh...it's you." His eyes wandered to the plate of eggs and toast in my hand. "Is that for...me?"
"Tch. Yes. I can't let you starve now can I?" He rolled his eyes. I shrugged it off and moved behind him to untie him. "Now listen, brat, I'm going to untie you so you can eat, because frankly I'm sick of feeding you like you're a four year old. Just eat it with you hands and don't try anything because I will shut you down before you can even think about doing anything. Not that that would be hard because how much of an idiot you are."
"Hey!" He looked up at me with his brows furrowed.
"What? It's true."I sat down in front of him on the floor. I really need to clean down here. It's filthy. Instead of defending himself he gave up and took a hold of the plate. I watched as he once again scarfed down his food like an animal. After finishing his first piece of bread he looked up at me with a curious look.
"Aren't you going to eat?"
"Hmm?" I looked down at my untouched plate. "Oh." I lifted up my mask just enough for my mouth to peek out so I could eat. After taking a few bites I realized he was staring at me.
"If you're trying to see my face it's not going to work. This is as much as you're ever going to see, brat." He blushed and looked away from me, " S-sorry. I didn't mean to stare. I'm curious that's all. It won't happen again." I nodded and we both continued to eat in silence.

We both finished our food and sat in silence for a few minutes. I decided that I should tell him where my head was at regarding this...situation.
"Okay, listen up."
He shook his head, "Okay."
"Like I've said before,  I don't want to do this. I didn't want to kidnap you and I didn't want to hurt you. It's an addiction. The longest I've ever gone without beating the shit out of someone is two months. I give you my word I will not harm you until the two months it's up. If you try anything though I will disregard what I said and torture you twice as bad."
He looked at me almost amused, "So you want me to stay here for two months just waiting for the next time you feel like torturing me again? That's the dumbest thing you've ever said."
He's right.
"I know it is. But this is the best I can do. I just don't want you terrified every time I walk down the stairs." I raised my voice slightly, "Normally, right now you would be beaten so hard you wouldn't be able to see."
"Then why haven't you done it already? Heck, If I'm such a brat why haven't you even killed me yet!"He raised his voice louder.
"I DON'T KNOW!" He backed away. I saw the same fear flicker in his blue green eyes.
Fear of me.
It made me sick to my stomach.

I lowered my voice, "I'm sorry I yelled. I didn't mean to scare you more than you already are." I turned my head to the ground, "The truth is I don't know why. I'm just....scared. I'm so damn scared..." His face softened as I felt my words crack.
"What are you scared of?"
I paused for a moment. I thought of everything that's happened. The hesitation, the doubt, the weird feeling in the pit of my stomach. Then I looked at him dead in the eye, "I'm scared of what you do to me."
His eyes widened in surprise at my words. He looked completely awe struck. "W-what do you mean?" I looked at his eyes. I took in how they sparked in the light and glimmered in the dark. I looked at the way his light brown hair fell on his face so perfectly. Then I tore my eyes away.
"Nevermind. I'll come back tonight and let you call your sister or whatever." He stayed silent as I tied him up again. I walked up the stairs and slammed the door shut behind me. I pressed my back against the door and slid down to the ground while burying my face in my hands.

What are you doing to me?

A/N

Yo
So I've been updating everyday because I've been writing everyday but for the next two weeks or so I can't promise to be as consistent as I normally am.
Well, thanks for reading.
Peace out.