hate to love you.

thirty-four

it's been three days, and nobody has seen dallas. it's all of my fault. this time, the negative thoughts are starting to push me over the edge.

why would i let this happen?

i went on my laptop and played some music and just laid there staring at my ceiling.

"gabs, come down here." demi yelled for me.

i slowly walked downstairs, and met demi sitting on the couch with a smile. i didn't smile back.

"what were you doing?" she asked.

i shrugged. she sighed. i haven't really been talking lately, declining phone calls, and not texting back.

"i have some news i would like to share with you." demi said as if it was life changing. i nodded.

"i'm going back on tour tomorrow." she said wit her eyes shut.

"our sister is missing and you're gonna go on tour? we're supposed to stay here and hope that she returns." i said.

she stayed quiet.

"you're so fucking selfish, demetria." i said through closed teeth.

"it's none of your business." she said calmly trying to wipe back a tear. she got up and ran upstairs.

i stayed there and finished watching the show she was watching, and about five minutes later, demi had a suitcase at the door.

she waved bye and walked out.

is this how my life is going to be? people leaving me all of the time? i don't think i can handle it.

now i'm here, all by myself, and nobody else here with me?

i walked upstairs and ran into my room. i sat down on the bed and laid down, grabbing my phone.

i had about three hundred missed calls from mom. i decided to call her back, before i did anything stupid.

"mom?" i said.

she sighed in relief. "you're coming back to texas." she said. i laughed, its a joke.

"no, i'm not." i said continuing to laugh, but she wasn't, so i stopped laughing.

"flight is tonight, babes." she said.

"see you soon." i said sighing and rolling my eyes, i slammed my phone down and began to pack up some of my stuff.

not forgetting to bring my friends.

i quickly called alyssa. she's been calling me also.

"hi! i'm so glad you're okay. i hope you didn't get in too much of trouble. i shouldn't have asked you to come." she said.

"no, it's perfectly fine. besides the fact that my sister is missing, and my other sister just left to go on tour tomorrow and i have to fly off to texas tonight." i said groaning.

"i'm so sorry. i shouldn't have done this. please, text me if you ever need anything. i'm always here for you." she said.

i laughed. "it's okay. it's my fault for going. you're fine. thank you, i will. love you lots." i said before hanging up.

i eventually called an uber to the airport and it arrived in about ten minutes.

when i reached the airport, it was packed, and there was a lot of paparazzi following me.

it made me so uncomfortable.

i made it to my plane and decided it'd be a good idea to go to sleep. nobody can bother me then.

about five minutes into my sleep, somebody decided to come sit next to me.

not being rude, it was a huge sweaty guy, who squished me in the window seat, so much that it hurt. this isn't going to do.

"excuse me." i said to him.

he looked down at me.

"you're kind of squishing me." i said.

"well, that's not my fault. you should've flown first class." he said shrugging. he smirked right after.

i pushed the flight attendant help button, and she came right as soon as she could.

"yes, ma'am." she asked.

"any, first class available?" i said shifting in my seat. she nodded and told me to follow her.

i moved over the guy, and he smiled. i rolled my eyes.

i walked all the way up to almost the front of the plane where there was air conditioning, t.v's and the good kind of food, but all i did was ask for a pillow. i'm so tired.

i heard the beep that indicated we were about to land, so i woke up and put on my seatbelt. i put in some gum and my headphones that they offered when we were landing.

my ears were still popping.

the plane landed, and as soon as i got off, i could smell the texas air. it somehow annoyed me.

i went to baggage claim and got my bag. walking out of the airport, i saw my mom waving with a big smile on her face.

"hi, baby!" she said hugging me and kissing me.

we sat down in the limo and began to take off.

"you know you're in trouble right?" she said smiling at me still. i nodded and started to shrink in my seat.

i must have fallen asleep, but when we reached the house, mom nudged me a bit and told me to wake up.

i nodded and got out of the car. she took my bags, and walked me up to the front door.

maddie was sitting down on the couch. she looked at me and came running up the stairs.

"i'm sorry." she said hugging me. i laughed and nodded. "it's okay, i love you." i said.

"can we play a game?" she said begging. i shook my head no. "i think it's time for me to go to sleep." i said rubbing my eyes.

she sadly nodded.

i ran upstairs, and went into my room. i left my suitcase on the floor, changed into my clothes and laid down on the bed.

that's when i fell into my darkest sleep.

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i'm in a river, water surrounding me. i'm sitting in a wooden boat that's keeping me afloat in the water.

i'm sane. everything's fine. i look all around me, and see a woman. she standing at the edge of the deep river.

she jumps.

i gasp, and the women comes above the water. it's dallas.

"dallas! no!" i scream, but it's too late, she holds her breath and pulls herself below the water.

i tried to get out of the boat, but i was stuck, watching my sister attempt to drown herself.

"dallas?" i say as the body climbs above the water, but it's lifeless.

dallas is dead.

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"gabs!" i heard mom screaming and crying trying to wake me up. tears streaming down her face.

"mom, what's wrong?" i said siting up and wiping the tears off of her face.

she stayed silent for a while, but then her sobs stopped in enough time to say the worst words i will ever hear.

"dallas was found dead." she said.

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a/n- oh no, dallas is dead. how? keep reading to find out more.

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