Labyrinth [BTS Fanfiction 1] (Hiatus)

Chapter 17

Graceful Venom

The next day I woke up at exactly 5 a.m. like I usually do only to find my hand was intertwined with Jin’s on Han Sung’s abdomen.

I did not pull away,  it did not irritate me like what I expected myself to react. Instead, it feels comfortable and familiar.

Do you ever know that feeling when you’re just hot and cold towards that person? When his existence alone irritates you but somehow you just like it so much that you unconsciously crave for him?

That’s exactly how I feel about Jin right now. I’m crazy, I know but I can’t hate him enough to unlove him or love him enough to unhate him. I’m just currently in the middle and there’s nothing I can do about that.

I stared at how my hand fits perfectly with his like heavens made it to match. Unknowingly, I was already smiling and something tickles in the pit of my stomach.

But then my demons are awake as well so I was reminded that he still has a price to pay and I’m here to make sure he pays it right.

My smile faltered as I slowly withdrew my hand from his gentle grip. I look at his sleeping figure next to my child and I was able to feel that fault in my humanity again. I know why he can’t love me.

I stood up and made my way to my room. Sitting in front of the vanity mirror, I brushed my long hazel wavy hair as I gazed at my own reflection.

It’s true that I look like a sixteen years old with my bare face but my eyes aged too much and no one noticed it. My hazel orbs has always been dull because there are just too many things that I carry with me and sometimes I just want to give up and breathe but I know I can’t. Or at least not yet.

The girl in the mirror looked so ethereal. She’s too angelic that nobody knows what kind of deeds she have enslave herself throughout these years.

The fame, the fortune, the glamour, the attention, the people’s expectations, everything,  I’m slowly getting tired of it all. But you know what’s more tiring? It’s the fact that I’m still doing it all for Jin.

I tied my waist-length thick hair into a bun and shove all those thoughts away so I could start my day normally.

I changed into a white fitted cotton short and a white spaghetti strap fitted cotton top and made my way to the mini gym.

Yoga,  it’s the only thing that keeps me sane in the morning.

I did my routines for a good hour and a half before I finally finished all my yoga program sets.

I was supposed to go back to my room and bathe but the alluring scent of a freshly brewed coffee draw me to the kitchen. Jin was already half-way through his cooking when I found him there.

“Morning.” I greeted.

“Morning. You’re up early.” He smiled as he fill a cup of coffee. God! Coffee is life!

“Body clock.” I replied casually with my eyes still glued on the cup of coffee.

“Really? The last time you sleep at my place you woke up at three.” He teased but somehow I’m not ashamed of it anymore. It feels normal.

“I was drunk and exhausted a night before that day so of course I’ll wake up late. But I usually wake up early.” I explained

“Seems like your body clock change as well. You hate mornings before.” He commented with a smile as he scoop two teaspoons of sugar only to put it in the coffee.

“Han Sung wakes up at 5 when he was a baby until he turned two so my body got used to it.” I explained.

“Must be tough.” He looked at me with sympathy that I no longer needed. “Here.” He then handed me the cup of coffee that was already mixed with cream. “I know you now like your coffee black but a little sweetness won’t hurt, right?” he smiled again and resume frying some sausages.