Here We Go Again

22: Hospital? Yikes!

Wade was blinded by a too-bright light. For a split second he was convinced he was dying. Then he remembered that he can't die, so that wasn't a possibility. He blinked a few times and came to terms with his surroundings.

"A hospital?" he groaned. "Great." Hospitals and Wade Winston Wilson did not mix, considering the fact that his body healed insanely fast no matter what happened, and hospitals were there to help people heal. Wade didn't need hospitals, and he was sure they didn't need him.

"You're awake," a friendly voice said from the doorway. Wade rolled his eyes. He did not want to talk to a nurse right now. Nurses were overly polite, always trying their very best to make everyone comfortable, and Wade hated it.

"Leave me alone." The voice tsked.

"That's no way to treat an old pal." Wade turned and looked, confused. He actually gasped when he saw the one and only Harry Osbourne in the doorway. "Heard you fell off a building."

"I jumped, actually," Wade corrected, as if that was any better. Harry rolled his eyes and walked into the room, pulling a chair up next to the bed and taking a seat. He kicked his feet up onto Wade's bed and shot him a grin. "What brings you back to the city?"

"I've been here the whole time. I was just cooped up in my father's house."

"How's he doing?" Wade asked, looking around the room. Harry stared at him for a moment.

"You didn't hear? He died a few months ago." Wade frowned.

"Oh. Sorry. How are you?" Harry shrugged.

"I'm doing alright. We weren't exactly close. You know that. How's Pete doing?"

"He's probably not doing so hot right now." Harry raised an eyebrow. "His uncles got married yesterday and he got a bit drunk and told me that a while back, when I almost got blown up, I was actually unconscious for eight whole days while Matt let Peter fuck himself up and drink till he couldn't walk." Harry visibly bristled at that.

"Matt? The lawyer?"

"The very same."

"You think he'd know better." Harry's voice was colder now. "Why didn't he tell you before?"

"He said I would have gotten mad at him."

"And I'm assuming you confronted him and Matt about it, resulting in a tragic argument? Which is why you jumped off the roof?" Wade smiled.

"You always knew just how to read me, man. You got it just right. I mean, there was some heavy drinking on my part before the whole roof bit, and some pot, but I'm unaffected. Which sucks." Wade sighed and went to cross his arms only to notice his left one was in a sling. He looked at in in confusion. "What's wrong with my arm?"

"You dislocated your shoulder, but they popped it back in. You also sprained your ankle and suffered some serious scrapes and there's a gash on your calf and, logically, should be dead." Wade laughed.

"We both know that won't happen," he said with a grin. Harry rolled his eyes. "Hey, c'mon, that was funny. Ya know, because I can't die."

"You're insufferable."

"I'm taking that as a compliment." Harry chuckled. "Hey, when can I get outta here?"

"Well, usually you'd need to pay your medical expenses and sign some papers, but you'll just have to sign the papers." Wade gave him a confused look. Realization slowly dawned on his face and he groaned.

"Harry Osbourne, if you payed my hospital bill I might actually kill you." Harry shrugged. "You're the worst person I know. Why can't you just let me go into debt? That would be so much easier for you, man. Don't waste your money on me!"