Dawning (Dysmorphia Series #3)

Absence

Considering the fact that Charlie had done her a massive favour Florence decided that it was time to put whatever had happened in the past behind them, she had two months now of utter freedom for university and from the life that came with it, the least she could do was try and heal a former friendship.

She didn't exactly know what had gone wrong between the two of them, it had all been so messy and rushed but what she did know was that the only way to solve a problem was to talk it out and find a solution.

The trouble was, she didn't know exactly where Charlie was, neither did her parents, and Andrew left for South Africa today.

Up till now she hadn't really wanted to consider how his absence would affect her, after all she had been bursting with pride when he had enlisted in a programme to help build an orphanage in a provincial village, she had been too stressed out with assignments and deadlines to consider going with him and now she was regretting that.

Getting engaged had made her realise just how much she loved him in the little things and the big, like how he always left her a bag of peanut M&M's on her birthday because she had told him how much she missed them, he ordered them online specially.

And how he always gave her a weather report when they woke up, she was smiling now just thinking about it, he'd mix the weather in with their plans for the day and never fail to make her laugh.

And how he could make a lasagne to rival even her Mothers, sure it was the only thing he could cook but it was so nice she didn't even mind.

And how just this morning he'd presented her with a white pillow and then held up his own and explained to her that they were long-distance relationship pillows, if the other person was sleeping the pillow would light up, so even though they wouldn't still be together in a way they still would be.

She'd cried at that, the fact that someone could love her so much that they would want to be near her at all times was still baffling, she was getting better at the whole self-confidence and body positivity thing, especially with her hoards of fans telling her how amazing her books wre but sometimes just looking in the mirror could put her off eating for an entire day, but still it was better than before.

Florence was never going back to how it had been before.

And now she faced an entire month without Andrew, yes there were phones and yes she had her pillow but it still wouldn't be the same as seeing him in the flesh, but she didn't want to let any of this on to him, he was already having cold feet, reluctant to leave her and do his own thing and she didn't want to be the type of girl who stopped her boyfriend from going places because she was clingy.

And she knew Andrew, if she looked too upset he'd cancel everything, one of the curses that came with being such a caring person at the slightest hint that she would find it hard to be without him, he would turn over all his plans.

She wouldn't let him do that, today she would paint on a brave face just as she was applying her lipstick, once applied she wouldn't let it fade until he was safely on the aeroplane, then she would allow herself to feel whatever she liked.

Andrew's parents were already waiting in a taxi when she came out of the house, his Mother was smoothing back his hair with her fingers and quizzing him about everything he'd packed and whether he'd taken insect repellent, he looked up at her as she climbed into the car and tried to smile but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

It had been decided that Florence would go back to her parents in Phillipson for the month, she didn't want to stay in an empty apartment and wanted to spend more time there, she had things to do in her hometown.

The ride to the airport was far too quick, she clung on tightly to Andrews hand and he squeezed hers back with the same intensity, it shouldn't be this hard to let go, should it?

And then the penny dropped, there was still that part in her a kind of defence mechanism she still thought that people she loved who entered her life would abruptly leave, just like Chase had, and for some reason she felt a strong feeling that this was history repeating itself, that Andrew wouldn't come back just like Chase hadn't if she let him leave.

But that was stupid, this wasn't history repeating itself this was the present and Andrew would be fine, he was going with a group of twenty people and doing a selfless charitable act, she needed to stop being a paranoid wreck.

All airports looked the same, whether in France or the USA they looked identical, at least to Florence, a hundred suitcase wheels rolling, expensive products in duty free shops and haggard looking passengers making their way to terminals, they had to leave Andrew after he had checked his luggage in, all of them dreading saying goodbye.

Leila embraced her son and then shoved a bag at him.

"Insect repellent, another mobile in case yours somehow breaks, two extra chargers and $500, don't make that face you never know what might happen to you"

Florence blinked in surprise as Leila burst into tears and then sloppily kissed her son twice on each cheek not listening to his protests about the bag's contents.

"I tried to stop her Andrew, really I did"

His Father also hugged him, tears leaking out of his eyes.

"Stay safe my son and you make sure you call often, you know how your Mother worries if you don't you'll probably have the CIA searching for you"

His Mother half protested half snorted.

"We'll leave the two of you to say your own goodbyes"

The two of them walked away sniffling leaving her and Andrew.

"Typical Mum that is" Andrew muttered.

"Well..."

They seemed to have nothing to say to each other, Florence knew the more prolonged their goodbye was the harder it would be for both of them, so she leaned forwards and kissed him instead hoping her kiss would convey all she meant to say.

"I love you so much, and I'm so proud of you, you stay safe and call me whenever you can"

"I love you too, and I will"

The loudspeaker emanated an announcement, he had to leave.

With one last hug and a wave, Andrew was gone.