I dont know how but I found myself outside reading on a bright and beautiful day. The sun was shinning down on my lazily, the wind blowing lightly enough that it didnt disrupt my book. I smiled to myself as I continued to read the third book in the Mortal Instruments series, City of Glass.
Cassandra was an amazing writer but I had to say she messed with my emotions a lot. I couldnt help but think to myself of the line they added in to Catching Fire. "Someday I want someone to love me that much."
It reminded me of how much I wanted to feel loved. To be loved. I remember the days when zi was young and not so cynicle. Where the world so so bright and beautiful. Now it seems all grey and depressing. Since the incident when I was young it changed my perspective on so many things. My disability to do things made my brain go all crazy. Unlike most I thought of small things of just being selfish and it kills me when I mentally scold myself out of habbit. My mom told me to stop and just relax, that they were happy to help but...
What if they werent?
I sighed and closed my book. Proceeding to lay flat on my back and stare at the clouds. Making their shapes with my finger. Tracing their light and fluffy texture.
My phone snapped my attention.
Dinah.
A smile rose on my lips as I answered.
Hello?
Hi.
Dinah?
That would be my name. Do you have that bad of memory that I must remind you every time? She laughed over the phone.
I grimanced. She was right though. That was techincally a problem of mine. My memory was best when I took more Yin Fe then I needed. Other wise it was easy for my thoughts to drift away from when I needed them most.
Kind of like then.
Hello?
Her voice snapped my attention back.
Yes.
Normani are you alright?
Im fine.
Are you sure?
Yes.
Silence.
Then:
Hows the reading?
Amazing but she is a total jerk. Needs a plot twist limit on her stories.
Speaking of the reading I finished the book theif.
I grinned. And?
Aweful! That was the worst ending ever. And Ive read the Fault in Our Stars.
I know right!? I cried so badly.
You did? She sounded surprised.
Yes. I have this depressing swing set I was able to sit on while I cried.
There was a laugh. I must see this swing set of depression at once! I'll be there in 10.
~~~~~~~
I heard the knock on the door and my mom answer. I stayed in my spot on the ground though. It was nice and my muscles werent exactly ready to obey yet. I could tell that everything was sore and hurt so much. Sad enough.
My mom was argueing with Dinah. I immediatly noted.
"Who are you?" Her voice was a little too harsh to be friendly.
Dinah wasnt phazed. "Im here to see Normani. She lives here doesnt she?"
"Yes."
"May I please see her?"
"No."
"Why?"
"Normani is resting."
"She talked to me a minute ago."
I could feel my mom cursing in her head. "She fell asleep."
"Okay then I just wanted to see your guys backyard. I heard there was a swingset."
Before my mom could protest Dinah was there. She looked smugly at me as she had beat my mom out. Wearing jeans and a batted up hoodie. Dinahs hair wasnt straightened like I had seen it but now was a mess of friz and curls.
I smiled. "Hi Dinah."
My mom shot me a glare.
Dinah didnt even seem to care. She sat down beside me and smiled. "Hi."
My mom stormed back in the house.
Once the door had shut Dinah commented, "Im pretty sure your mom hates me."
I nodded. "She doesnt like a lot of people."
"Why?"
"Because of my accident."
"It was a fire." She said, confusion displayed in her tone.
I shrugged.
She turned to see the swingset. Not much. Just some swings, a side, and a platform to play on, levitated slightly off the ground. Well I shouldnt say slightly. Enough so that if I sit on it my feet dangle, brushing slightly.
"Ah, that is depressing."
"Told ya."
Dinah grinned. Expousing her perfectly straight teeth. "You should fix it up."
I shook my head. "Cant."
"Why not?"
"Cause."
"Your not going to tell?"
"Nope."
"Your a difficult code to decipher." She commented.
I laughed. "Good."
My head began to feel light and my memory began fading. I couldnt remember why she had shown up or what was going on. I stared blankly at the clouds. My head was spinning and my world with it.
It was only when I heard her voice again did I realise what had happen.
"Sorry I intruded, thanks for letting me come over."
I turned my head to see my mom with my glass and Dinah leaving. My mom wore a weird expression I couldnt quite decipher. I downed the glass quickly. My lungs burning for it, my body thanking the relief.
Thats when I realised my mom looked angry. But not at me.
Dinah was still standing in the doorway. But she was looking straight at me, ignoring my mom completely.
"Promis me you'll tell me oneday." She said.
I winked. "Maybe. Okay?"
She smiled. "Okay. Okay. I can live with that."
