Bleeding hearts

Chapter Twenty

"Hi "he smiled coming closer and pulling me for a hug ,awkwardly putting his arms around my back and i just stood there my arms by my sides still frozen and unblinking .

"How are you ?"he asked as he pulled back ,looking me up and down "You look amazing "

i stared at him ,the same light brown hair ,the same green eyes .He looked so much like him it hurt to look

"where you here for the memorial ?i didn't see you at the cemetery though "he frowned "you should've at least said hi "he smiled

"Memorial ?"i whispered

his eyes widened "their two years anniversary "

I looked at Chris's big brother letting what he just said hit me ,and it hit me so hard i lost balance ,swaying and almost falling if Dean's arms didn't go around my waist and steady me .

"Babe"he whispered pulling me closer to his body

"oh ,hey Man "Caleb extended his hand seeming now to notice Dean "Caleb Mathews "

"Dean Collins "he took his hand "Addison's boyfriend "

Caleb's eyes widened as they bounced from me to Dean then back to me "That's so good to hear ,it's great to see you've moved on "he smiled genuinely "Mom will be thrilled to hear this "he pulled me for a hug again "it was really good seeing you "he pulled back "come over if you're here longer ,mom will be happy to see you"

I nodded unable to speak through the lump in my throat and watched as he walked away ,feeling it was Chris walking away from me all over again

Dean's handsome face came in my line of vision making me blink

"are you okay ?"he asked ,his jaw clenched like he's mad

i nodded managing a wobbly smile

he stepped back "who was that ?"

i just looked at him ,not really seeing him and thinking of another guy that managed to destroy my heart

Dean ran his hand through his hair "it was like you forgot i was standing there "he swallowed looking away "like i was never there "

tears fell down my face ,realizing i'm continuing to hurt him through all this without meaning to and he was still standing there not running away without a look back

"what's wrong, baby ?please don't cry "he took my face in his hands brushing the tears away "i hate seeing you cry"

i took a shuddering breath,closing my eyes not able to stare at the pain itched in his features.

"Come on ,we're getting out of here"he said putting his arms around my waist and dragging me away from where we stood

I just felt numb ,letting him drag me outside to the cold night air

"Stay here ,i'll go back inside to let your family know that we're leaving "he said giving me a kiss to the temple and walking away

how did it ended up to this ? i forgot the one thing i wasn't able to forget for the past two years .and i knew who was the reason after that ,i couldn't blame Dean though ,because for the first time in two years i felt alive again ,but if being alive meant forgetting everything i once cared for then i didn't want to be alive  .

I felt guilty and angry at myself ,i betrayed Chris .

Not caring about the crowd outside ,i took off my heals and sprinted down the street with only one destination in my mind ,it wasn't far away from here but i didn't care ,i need to get there NOW .