Sink or Swim

10

Harry's POV

April 12, 1912 - 10:05am

I sighed as I held the suit in my hands as I stood outside Jane's room. I took in a deep breath and knocked on the door.

I stood up straight, bracing myself for the meeting that I was about to have with her. I was only here to give back her suit, nothing more and nothing less. I was also returning the swim suit she bought me. 

I didn't feel the need of it anymore.

Last night showed me what kind of a person Jane was, and if I was being completely honest, that wasn't the type of person I wanted to associate myself with. She was rude, and if I'm honest again, quite entitled. 

I took in a deep breath as her door opened, and she was revealed to me. She wore a pink silk robe and her hair was put up into a neat bun. Her brown eyes widened as she took in my appearance. I nodded and held out my arms with the suits, which she furrowed her eyebrows at and looked at me.

"I'm returning your suits," I said. She slowly took the clothes out of my hand and I brought my hands to my suspenders, thumbing them up and down as I shifted on my feet.

"The swim suit is in there too," I murmured, "I do not wish to keep your things."

She looked at me guiltily and I simply cleared my throat before I stepped back and nodded, "Jane."

I walked away.

~

I don't know why I was feeling so down in the dumps.

I don't know why Jane was affecting me so.

Normally, when someone made a crack about my status, I'd just shrug it off and let myself be. But not with Jane. With her, I wanted to impress her. I constantly found the need to see her impressed look, the one where she raises an eyebrow and smiles approvingly. 

I saw that look when she looked me over in the swim suit. I felt that I wanted to see that look more often. 

I just didn't know why.

I sighed as I looked out at the ocean. The blue Atlantic seemed vast as the waves crashed against the side of the boat. I looked down at the water and frowned. 

How deep was this water?

It probably wasn't-

"Why so gloomy?"

I turned to find Fred leaning over next to me. His blonde hair flew around in the wind as he looked at me. I sighed and shrugged.

"I don't even really know, if I'm honest," I said, "I mean, Jane is not who I thought she was?"

Fred tilted his head at me, "meaning?"

"Last night at the party, she completely lied to her parents about who I was! I was sitting down with them for dinner and I was all pressed up in this fancy suit. I looked just like one of them and her parents obviously thought I was a first class passenger from the way that I dressed. And then they went to go ask what my family did and-"

"Oh no..."

"I was about to tell them that my mother had passed away and my father left at a young age, but then she interrupted me and told them my father owned a factory for furniture," I finished with a huff, "I mean, it's one thing to be ashamed of having to spend time with someone. But then to also lie to your own parents about it?"

"Harry, I'm sure she didn't mean anything by it," Fred sighed. I shook my head wistfully.

"Maybe she didn't," I agreed, "but it still hurt."