Sink or Swim

15*

Jane's POV

April 12th, 1912 - 1:35am

We crashed through the doors of the empty gymnasium, lips colliding messily as we clung together. Nobody was out here as everybody was most likely sleeping or in the dining room and parlor room...or partying.

Harry kept his lips planted to mine as he led me to one of the walls in the room. He pressed me up against the wall and placed his hands on either side of me. I groaned lightly as he kissed my neck and worked down.

All of this was new to me. Very new. I tried to calm myself as his hands lifted one of my thighs to rest on his hip and pressed himself into me. I gasped and he chuckled, nipping at the skin just under my ear.

"Harry," I panted, placing my hands on his head.

"Hmm?"

I opened my mouth to speak but found no words coming out. I closed my eyes and bit my lip and pulled his face to mine, crashing my lips against his as he wrapped his hands around my waist. My leg dropped from his waist and he groaned as he pressed his body into mine, pushing me further back into the wall.

Did I want to do this tonight? I'll admit myself, I was beginning to grow feelings for Harry but I wasn't sure if it was love yet. In the past couple of days that I had been with him, I had been truly happy. I had disobeyed my mother, for the first time ever, and I had finally begun to make my own choices. I felt grateful for him. I felt grateful to him.

But I sure as hell didn't want to lose my virginity to Mark. I bit my lip and pulled away from him to find him staring at me unsure.

"I want to," I breathed, blushing wildly, "I want to..."

He brushed his nose against mine as we stood in the dark room, the only light being offered to us was that of the moon through the window. He smirked as he pecked my lips softly.

"I don't want you to feel rushed," he whispered, "I'll be glad to wait."

I shook my head, suddenly allowing my body to speak for me - the want for him becoming too much for me. I knew in my head that I shouldn't do this; it wasn't what my mother would want. But then, I needed to learn to detach myself from my mother's thoughts and morals...

"I want to do this," I breathed, "I trust you. I will be honest, what I feel for you isn't, well, love...but I do feel something. And- and I want to do this."

He pursed his lips as he took a step back, "you sure this isn't just because I'm helping you let yourself go? I want you to want this, Jane."

"Do you want this?" I asked. He shook his head.

"It's not about what I want," he whispered, hand coming up to caress my cheek.

"It should be about what both of us want," I replied, "I want this. Do you?"

"Oh darling," he sighed, "I've wanted this since the night I first kissed you, if I'm honest."

I blushed and smiled, as did he and leaned up to kiss him. He returned my actions and cupped my face, kissing me with a passion that I had never seen from him.

"Are you sure," he whispered against my lips as his hands trailed down, "once we do this, it's done baby. I can't take it back, neither can you."

I nodded and buried my face in his neck, "I want to."

He nodded and lifted my head up gently, looking at me before he ducked his head and planted his lips to mine. I wrapped my arm around his neck and he placed his hands on my waist. I slowly moved my hands to his shirt and began tugging it upwards, giving him the hint to remove it.